


Game of Survival

by sunkwans



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: (but happy birthday carrot), Angst, BAMF Alec Lightwood, BAMF Magnus Bane, But there will be fluff, Clary Fray Bashing, Confused Magnus Bane, Demon Alec Lightwood, Demon Summoning, Eventual Happy Ending, Eventual Smut, F/F, F/M, Falling In Love, Feelings Are Confusing, I just love him, I'm pretty sure, M/M, Magnus Bane Deserves Nice Things, Sassy Alec Lightwood, Sassy Magnus Bane, Warlock Magnus Bane, Who, actually two someones, but you get the point, he's actually really cool and i love him, i'm also not sorry, i'm not her biggest fan, is - Freeform, magnus is the sass master, sebastian is not evil, she, slow burn?, so is alec lightwood, someone's gonna dieeee, sorry i meant alexander, the best warlock to ever warlock, this is not a fluffy story, this shit isn't planned out
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-23
Updated: 2017-09-11
Packaged: 2018-12-19 05:05:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 7
Words: 20,553
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11890641
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sunkwans/pseuds/sunkwans
Summary: Alexander slowly removed his fingers from Magnus' forehead.Magnus noticed that there was pain in Alexander's eyes as well. Never before had Magnus met a demon who had emotions.Alexander backed away slowly, his eyes trained on Magnus'.Magnus wanted to walk forward with him.And then Magnus wanted to hit himself.This was a demon. Alexander wasn't a person. But why had he shown Magnus his worst memory instead of Magnus' own?*demon!alec au :)





	1. Envy.

**Author's Note:**

> welcome, angels, to another one of my crazy stories.
> 
> so this is a demon!alec au.  
> alec hAS FEELINGS IN THIS. i like my demons pure and with feelings!!!
> 
> also, this is magnus bane-centric because i love my man very much. 
> 
> enjoy, angels <3
> 
> guys, this story is all over the place, but here's some info so your head isn't exploding.  
> -this is like the demon summoning from 2x11, but they don't have val, and raph & si are there because i love the two of them very much.  
> -no one switches bodies, thank you very much.  
> -simon has already almost killed that mundane.  
> -the dEMON demands payment :)))))  
> and a lot more that i will talk about later.

 

Magnus was tired of always answering to the Clave when they never did anything for him. It was a vicious cycle, Magnus being the Shadowhunter's lapdog. Luckily for him, they paid very, very handsomely for his assistance.

But this call was personal.

Clary had called Magnus in hysterics, asking him if he'd seen Isabelle in the last two days, then sobbing and hiccuping like a mess when he said that he hadn't.

Magnus actually really liked Isabelle. She treated him like an actual person and over looked the fact that there was magic thrumming through his veins, and slits in his eyes.

The fact that Izzy was gone really sucked, so Magnus had- stupidly- asked Clary what he could do to help. The only sound that had filled Magnus' ear when he asked that was Clary's gasping breaths. Girls could be so over dramatic- although, Magnus had to admit, he also had a flair for dramatics if his looks were anything to go by.

Magnus knew that Clary and Isabelle were in love. Everyone knew that. It was obvious in the way their eyes would meet across a room, and their touches would linger longer than necessary. Magnus was happy that they were happy, even if that meant they had to hide it away. Love was love, and it was still love if not everyone knew about it.

Clary had told Magnus that Isabelle went out on a mission to go deal with a few vampires- "not Raphael and Simon, obviously, because they usually just deal with each other"- and she hadn't returned.

Clary said that they'd found Isabelle's demon necklace that Magnus gifted her so long ago broken and battered, lying on the dirty ground. Magnus knew for a fact that the only person who could destroy the necklace like how it had been would be a greater demon. It seemed to have imploded, the material on the inside that pulsed and announced the presence of a demon was the part that had shattered the glass.

Clary said that they had found a sand-like sort of material that the demon left behind, and Magnus was there to look at the sand and see if he could see where the sand was from, or where the demon could've taken Isabelle. Clary had told Magnus that her and Jace had searched for Isabelle together- _parabatai_ tracking was strong, but the two of them hadn't gotten even a glance of where Isabelle might be- and so, there Magnus was, standing in front of the Institute, readying himself to enter the cold building.

The outside of the Institute was rustic looking, cracking brown-stone, vines growing up the edges of it. There was still a charm to the building that intrigued Magnus, but he'd never liked going inside of the cathedral, only because of the sour looks he'd get from the Shadowhunters.

Clary had said that they would meet in an open area, sort of like the back yard of the Institute, but to get there Magnus had to walk through the Institute, and he hated seeing Shadowhunters give him the look, the one that said he wasn't worthy of being in their building because of his demon blood.

Magnus was glad to have Clary, Jace, and Isabelle in the Institute- well, usually Isabelle, of course- because they always told the other Shadowhunters to fuck off. Magnus could definitely stand up for himself, but if he tried to do that he'd probably never be allowed back in.

Clary was waiting on the doorstep of the Institute, and Magnus frowned upon noticing that her red/orange hair seemed duller. It was as if the loss of Isabelle was taking a toll on Clary, physically and mentally. It really hurt Magnus seeing Clary like that. He'd known her for a very long while.

But the fact of the matter was: Clary used him. Just like every other Shadowhunter. Maybe it was in their blood. Maybe Magnus would never know.

"Hiya there, biscuit. Are you ready for this?"

Clary stood up, slowly, as if she didn't want to move. Her eyes were puffy and blood shot, her hair was greasy. She looked like a girl with a broken heart, and Magnus hurt for her. "Ready as I'll ever be."

"So tell me the plan again as we walk."

 

Magnus thought that Jace was being a bit over dramatic. Jace had called in Simon and Raphael because he felt like "we should have at least four of the points occupied, because we can't have a five."

The plan seemed solid, if not a bit shaky.

Magnus was to, of course, summon the demon, while the other three pretty much just stood there like a sack of potatoes. Magnus would ask the demon that had been summoned where Isabelle Lightwood was.

Magnus knew who he'd be summoning, but he hadn't told the other ones that. They all would've freaked out and started painting crosses on the wall.

Anyways, after Magnus "demanded" Isabelle Lightwood, Clary was to come out and draw her infamous sunlight rune, destroying the Greater Demon.

Magnus decided that now was the time to tell Jace, Simon, and Raphael who would be coming out of the pentagram. "The demon I will be summoning is named Alexander. You might know him. He is a Greater Demon, with a power much greater than we can even dream. He will be strong and he will be deadly. He might ask for a payment, like Valaak. I don't know what the payment will be, so don't even ask, Sherman. We need to make this quick. I will have trouble keeping him in the pentagram, because, he's stronger than even me. I know, crazy right? Shall we begin?"

Simon looked pale- well, paler than usual, almost like a sheet of paper- Raphael just looked bored, and Jace looked apprehensive.

Magnus just wanted to get Izzy back so he could be home and in his bed, asleep.

Magnus felt the odd need to protect Raphael, to take him out of there, because Raphael was his child, in their own weird way. But Magnus knew that Raphael wouldn't appreciate that, and would probably call Magnus an old man, but Magnus couldn't help it. He loved too much.

The candles surrounding the area shifted and wavered as Magnus called upon his magic. He made sure that the glamour on the courtyard was still up, and he rubbed his hands together, giving Raphael one last glance.

Magnus took a deep breath. "I call upon the power of the pentagram." Magnus waved one arm, igniting one of the lines creating the star.

"Alexander! I summon thee." Another line sparking and crackling. "From within our realm, into this mystical confinement." A third line, lit. "I summon thee!" A fourth line. "You seek payment, and we seek the return of our friend." The fifth line, and the star was done.

Now, the circle. "For this exchange, I summon thee!" Magnus waved his arm, and the last part of the pentagram was finished.

He lifted his arms, and watched as a man stood from a crouch, his back to Magnus. He was wearing normal, mundane clothes- a leather jacket and tight fitting skinny jeans- and he held himself high.

Alexander turned around, and Magnus had his arms spread wide, still holding Alexander in the confines of the pentagram.

Alexander was beautiful, unlike Magnus had ever seen a Greater Demon be. He had messy black hair, tan skin, big, plump lips, and hazel eyes with shifting colors like a flame.

"Why hello there," Alexander said, looking at Magnus, and then the others in turn. His voice was deep, and calm, as if he wasn't being held in a pentagram, and instead they were all out for coffee.

"Alexander," Magnus began, waiting for Alexander to turn his attention on him. He did. "We want you to give our friend back."

Alexander tapped a long finger on his chin, probably noticing how Magnus' eyes followed his hand. "See, I don't think I will."

Magnus rolled his eyes. "You demons are so silly. We will give a payment. But we want Isabelle back."

Alexander shrugged. "Whatever. I'm going to take each of your saddest memories. Which means you'll have to relive it. I don't know why, but I'm in the mood to see some pain."

"I know why," Simon said, smiling. "Because you're a demon."

Alexander smirked. "Right you are, Simon Lewis. Did you know that you are part demon. See, funny how you Downworlders are always trying to get the Shadowhunters to listen to you because the both of you have mundane blood. You and I both have demon blood. Ever though of it that way?"

Simon shook his head, and Magnus had to hold himself back from throwing fire at the idiot vampire. "No. I haven't. Well, when you put it that way- nope, I'm still not good with siding with a demon. Can you just take our worst memory and go?"

The demon shrugged. "Sure. I guess you can go first because you're so adamant to have your memory relived." Alexander padded forward- still in the confines of the pentagram- and reached out a hand, touching his fingers to Simon's forehead.

Simon closed his eyes, a small whimper falling from his lips.

Alexander closed his eyes as well, but he didn't look to be in pain at all. If anything, his eyes were closed with pleasure.

Magnus wondered a moment what Simon was going through- what he was seeing- but it was none of Magnus' business in any sort of way.

Magnus watched with wide eyes as Alexander stepped away from Simon- who was sobbing, tears streaming down his face- and turned to face Raphael.

"Your turn, vampire."

Raphael practically growled when he saw Simon's broken expression on his face, but didn't move away when Alec's fingers came up to his forehead.

If Alexander was to continue going on this way, Magnus would be last in the "torture."

Magnus's heart contracted painfully in his chest when he saw Raphael's face transform from obviously pissed, to a hauntingly sad expression.

Magnus knew what Raphael was seeing. The day Guadalupe Santiago died was a horrible day, for Raphael and Magnus. For Raphael, because, well, that was his mom. And for Magnus because anytime Raphael was in pain, Magnus was. Raphael had tried to hold in his tears as he watched from afar, his mother's casket being lowered into a dug up hole. Raphael was damned, therefor he couldn't step a single foot into a graveyard. Magnus stayed with Raphael because he couldn't let Raphael be alone during a time like this. Magnus remembered all too well when Raphael had tried to commit suicide.

Eventually, a tear had slipped down Raphael's face and he'd fallen to the dirt, choking on sobs while Magnus wrapped his arms around Raphael, holding in his own tears to be strong for his best friend.

Now, a tear slipped down Raphael's face, but Magnus couldn't be there to hold him.

Alexander still held his fingers up to Raphael's forehead, but turned to look at Magnus, his eyebrows drawn together. Magnus didn't know what the look was for, but he didn't question it, instead looking away from Alexander and to Jace.

Jace had his jaw clenched, his bi colored eyes hard. There was a tension residing in Jace's body as he looked at Alexander.

Alexander removed his fingers from Raphael's forehead, watching as Raphael practically curled in on himself, holding strong arms to his stomach and squeezing, as if keeping himself together by sheer force.

Alexander turned away, looking at Jace with clear, hazel eyes.

Magnus could've sworn he imagined it when Alexander's eyes softened, because after blinking and looking back, Alexander already had his fingers on Jace's forehead, hazel eyes sharp.

Magnus was tired of watching his friends break into pieces, and instead looked at the magic pouring from the palms of his hands every once in a while. The magic was red, like fire. The color of his magic depended on what he was using it for. Normally Magnus' magic was blue.

Magnus flinched when he heard a sob tear its way out of Jace's throat.

It was terrifying, watching the strongest people break like that.

Magnus hadn't been surprised to see Simon crying- it happened often, although it was usually about some dumb movie- or Raphael, because even though it happened so little, Magnus knew that Raphael cried.

Everyone cried.

But Jace, well, Jace was different. He thought that feelings were a distraction, that to love was to destroy and to be loved was to be destroyed. Jace was a stoic soldier.

Magnus didn't even like Jace that much, but seeing- no _hearing_ \- Jace break, made Magnus' heart hurt.

Magnus heard Alexander hum in his throat, and then Alexander was walking to Magnus, his feet quiet on the hard ground.

Magnus looked Alexander right in the eyes. It was scary, Magnus thought, how Alexander had a light in his eyes that Magnus had only ever seen in actual people.

Magnus didn't flinch when Alexander's hands came to rest upon his forehead.

The fingers were warm and soft.

Magnus looked on, watching Alexander. He was beautiful, really. Like a coiled snake ready to attack, or like the way a tear falls so perfectly from an open eye.

Magnus closed his eyes with a gasp.

There was a pentagram- much like the one he had around himself.

But this one had a boy in it. A young, little boy.

Alexander.

He was screaming, crying, begging- begging, and _begging_ \- for help, to be let out. He was saying that it hurt, that he hurt. There was a fire rising from the lines of the pentagram, fire rising around him.

It was vivid. Magnus could feel the heat from the fire, could feel what Alexander felt. He felt the pain, the betrayal, the despair.

Little Alexander didn't know what was happening to himself.

Alexander was probably about twelve. His black hair was moppy, falling into his eyes. The same hazel eyes. These eyes just reflected a fire that no child should have to see.

"Mommy, please! Take me out!" There was no reply. No one was there. Alexander was yelling for shadows.

Magnus couldn't breath. His lungs were filling with smoke. Every inhale was more smoke than oxygen, and every exhale became lesser and lesser.

The ground shifted. It was like an earthquake, but it was only focused beneath Magnus' feet. It was terrifying.

Magnus watched on in horror as the floor fell out from beneath Alexander, and he was screaming for him, trying to tell Alexander "I'm here, I'm here!" but nothing would come out of his throat but a choked sob.

Magnus knew where Alexander was going, and he also knew that Alexander would never come back.

Hell was real, and it was unforgiving.

 

Magnus came back into reality with a jolt. He could feel steady tears streaming down his cheeks, clinging to his jaw. Every time he shut his eyes, he was seeing Alexander fall into the hole. Over and over again.

Alexander slowly removed his fingers from Magnus' forehead.

Magnus noticed that there was pain in Alexander's eyes as well. Never before had Magnus met a demon who had emotions.

Alexander backed away slowly, his eyes trained on Magnus'.

Magnus wanted to walk forward with him.

And then Magnus wanted to hit himself.

This was a demon. Alexander wasn't a person. But why had he shown Magnus his worst memory instead of Magnus' own? And why did Magnus want to say something- anything. Like an "I'm sorry" that had never made sense to Magnus in the first place. Or maybe Magnus should give him a hug? What do you say to someone who's had their entire life taken away?

"I hope you all enjoyed the show," Alexander said, not looking at Magnus.

No one said anything. No one dared break the silence.

"So, on the subject of your dear Isabelle." Did Magnus imagine it or did Alexander's voice soften on her name? "I don't have her. I will tell you where she is."

Jace huffed. "We want to know."

Alexander nodded. "I thought you would want to know. She is with a Shadowhunter named Sebastian Verlac. He is in New York. Go find her quickly."

"Thank you," Magnus said. "Now, you need to go back to hell."

That was Clary's cue. She walked out, already drawing on the sunlight rune. (The Shaodwhunters still hadn't thought up a name for it.) Her face was pure determination. She flung out her hand- where the Mark was shining gold- but nothing happened. The rune disappeared into her skin. She tried again, and nothing shot from her hand. Nothing.

Alexander frowned, his eyes on Clary. "Oh that's unfortunate. I wasn't ready to leave anyways. Thank you for offering, though." Alexander threw his hands outward, and the pentagram exploded.

All five of them were propelled outward, flying in the air.

Magnus didn't land hard on the ground, but as if he'd landed on a pillow. He looked at the floor beneath him, but he was still on the hard ground.

The lights that were on in the courtyard had blown out, and Magnus knew that his glamour on the area had to have fell down.

"Magnus, what the fuck was that?" It was Jace, standing up, and rushing over to a barely sat up Magnus.

Raphael was beside Magnus helping him stand, his arms holding tightly to Magnus' own as if he needed the physical touch.

Magnus glared at Jace. "What do you mean? You're going to have to be a bit more specific, Trace. A lot just happened."

Jace sighed through his nose. "Where did _it_ go?"

Magnus just rolled his eyes. "Alexander is probably roaming around New York. We need to find Isabelle."

Clary was looking down at her own palm, her eyes full of unshed tears, her hair falling in orange waves around her solemn face.

Jace stepped closer to Magnus. "What do you think that we were here for? What did you do, Magnus Bane?"

Magnus brushed Raphael off lightly, stepping forward so that he was eye to eye with Jace. "I found your sister. I want to see you summon a demon without me. Next time, Shadowhunter, you need a warlock to do your dirty work, find another one."

Magnus pushed past Jace, and past Clary not looking back at them. He knew Raphael was following close behind him.

Magnus had a demon to hunt for.


	2. Lust.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Magnus jumped, almost falling, but a hand caught him on his forearm, holding him up. 
> 
> A hand he recognized. 
> 
> Magnus whirled around, facing Alexander behind him. "What- why are you here?"
> 
> Alexander waved his hand in the air. "To chat. It took you a while to get back here. I almost thought you weren't coming."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi, angels <3 (or should i say demons??? ;))
> 
> a very malec heavy chapter :)))))))))
> 
> so, i'm pretty sure the update schedule for this story will be all over the place. i will attempt to update as much as i can, but i'm very busy working another fic. 
> 
> -disclaimer:  
> this story will be very unrealistic compared to the shadow world we all know and (hopefully?) love.  
> i remember very well that azazel was a fucking beast and that i was really happy when he died because he hurt my baby and i was ready tO KILL  
> i also know that this is my weird mind playing with different ideas. i posted it because i hoped everyone would like the idea as much as i did.  
> the fact that alec has feelings is already unrealistic. yes, i understand. but also know that i'm creating my own sort of world like this. it is an alternate universe, after all.  
> -if you didn't have any care in the world about the fact that my story is wild as hell, then i'm sorry you had to read that (i hope y'all did read it) i just had to make it known that i know that this story is absolutely insane. so am i.
> 
> anyways, enjoy angels <3
> 
> -also, this story is not a slow burn. not at all. i like my malec qUICK.

Magnus had to portal Raphael to the Dumort. 

It was daytime already, the sun poking above the buildings and shedding light around the area. 

Magnus didn't want to portal Raphael; he was already tired from summoning Alexander, and he didn't want to run himself dry. But Magnus wouldn't make Raphael wait at the Institute until the sun went back down. Simon was staying- and he was a Daylighter anyways- so Magnus only had to portal Raphael, and then himself to go back home. 

"Raph, I know what you're thinking, and I will not allow it."

Raphael sighed. "You don't have to protect me, Magnus. I can do it myself. I am a vampire."

Magnus patted Raphael mockingly on the back. "And isn't that good for you? But Raphael he's a Greater Demon. It's not like you're up against a Shax demon. He's dangerous and he's powerful."

Raphael stopped walking, turning down a random corridor to get away from the prying eyes and keen ears. "Why do you keep saying 'he'? Greater Demons can take the form of anything."

"Because, that was Alexander. Alexander was a he. Simple. Raphael, he could kill you. You understand that, right?"

"Yes, Magnus, I understand that. But you know that he can kill you too."

Magnus sighed, wringing his hands, leaning up against one of the walls in the Institute and looking across the hallway to Raphael. "I'm more equipped to deal with Alexander. I have magic, and he knows my father. He wouldn't dare kill me, Raphael, and you know that."

"Well maybe I don't want you to die! Ever thought about that, Magnus?"

Magnus didn't reply. He wouldn't reply. He would find Alexander. 

Magnus lazily threw out his arm, and a portal whirled into existence. "I'm not arguing. Go home, Raphael. I'll call you later."

Raphael didn't argue anymore, just shot Magnus a dark look before disappearing into the portal. 

Magnus sighed heavily, before creating another portal. He wanted to get home quickly. The longer he was stuck in the Institute, the farther away he was from finding Alexander. 

And he had to find him. 

There was something about Alexander. Something that was different than Magnus had ever seen. 

Something  _human._

Magnus wanted to ask if anyone else had been shown the vision he had. But Magnus already knew the answer. 

 

The loft was hot when Magnus entered, and he shucked off his jacket, leaving him in a tight, sheer black button up and maroon pants. He kicked off his shoes by the door, and walked further into the loft, but stopped short when he saw a fire in the fireplace. 

"That's usually where you light your fires, yes?"

Magnus jumped, almost falling, but a hand caught him on his forearm, holding him up. 

A hand he recognized. 

Magnus whirled around, facing Alexander behind him. "What- why are you here?"

Alexander waved his hand in the air. "To chat. It took you a while to get back here. I almost thought you weren't coming. Now, is that grumpy vampire your boyfriend, or am I mistaken?"

Magnus scoffed. "He's more like- hey! I am not answering your questions. First off, you come into my home without telling me and then you interview me. For what? Does Duduaal have a newsletter now?"

Alexander held up his hands. "Hey, now. I'm just here to chat. One demon to another."

Magnus huffed, crossing the room to sit gracefully in one of his black armchairs. "I am not a  _demon._ I'm a Warlock. There is a difference, you know."

Alexander waved that away, going to sit in a chair across from Magnus, near the fire. "I will answer your questions. If you answer mine. No lying. I can tell, you know."

"Fine. I ask a question, you answer. You ask a question, I answer. You know, there is a much easier name for this."

Alexander tapped his chin. "And what might that be?"

"20 questions."

"But I might not ask 20 questions. What if I ask 19? Or 21?"

Magnus sighed. "You don't have to be so literal. What do they teach you down there?"

A fire built in those hazel eyes. "How to kill. To maim. How to be evil. Magnus, you are so very lucky you are up here and not with your father."

That comment made Magnus a bit uncomfortable- then again, so did talking about his father in general. Asmodeus wasn't a very nice demon to begin with. "I know that. I have spoken with my father before. Your turn for a question."

Alexander thought for a moment. "Why do you converse with Shadowhunters? I know that they are cruel to your kind."

Magnus really thought about his answer. He'd loved Shadowhunters before- Will, Jem, Henry, Jamie, Lucie- but he'd never thought about why. "Because it's inescapable. Being the High Warlock doesn't just mean I am the strongest. I also have to go to cabinet meetings with the Clave and deal with their racist bullshit. If you're asking why I'm friends with those Shadowhunters, I might have an answer. I watched Clary grow up. I feel responsible for her. Jace- well, I'm not really close to Jace. I don't have any sort of problem with him, but when something goes wrong, he's first to blame me. 

"Isabelle, though, she's different. She loves Downworlders. To her, our demon blood is normal. She doesn't see and issue in the fact that Vampires drink blood and will burn in the sun- except for Simon. She doesn't care that Werewolves must turn. She doesn't care that Seelies can't lie. And she doesn't care that Warlocks have demon marks. She is different and she is good."

Alexander looked thoughtful. His lips were relaxed, his eyes calm. But Magnus could see a storm raging behind the façade. "That is good. But I've never met anyone who would overlook demon blood. Not even the ones  _with_ demon blood."

"Well, I'm talking to you right now, aren't I?" 

Alexander hummed, but didn't answer. "Your turn."

Magnus tapped his fingers on his knee. "Did you show everyone that vision? Or was it just me?"

"It was just you. I saw something different in you."

"What did you see?"

Alexander clicked his tongue. "My turn, Magnus. You said that you're speaking to me. But are you afraid of me?"

Magnus checked his body. His guard was up, but then again, it always was. He wasn't afraid. He really wasn't. "Yes."

If Alexander caught the lie, he didn't say anything. "Exactly. Your turn."

Magnus magicked a drink in his hand, taking a deep sip before answering. "Why did you come to my loft?"

"I wanted to talk to you. See you again."

Magnus shook his head. "A lie."

"It is only fair for one lie to slip from my lips as one has from yours, don't you think?"

"You speak like a fairie. Why is that?"

Alexander didn't say that it wasn't Magnus' turn for a question. "Because living beneath the Earth you live on has shown me things you can't even dream of. If I speak in riddles, sometimes there are those who aren't intelligent enough to catch them. I see I have no such issue with you, though."

"I will take that as a compliment. You get two questions."

Alexander nodded. "So. The vampire. A boyfriend?"

Magnus shook his head. "More like my responsibility. He's like a son to me."

"Very sweet of you. Why did my memory affect you so? Why were you screaming out for a child you never knew?"

This was a lot more than Magnus had been expecting. There was a reason Magnus didn't want to lie to Alexander, but he didn't want to look that far into it. But he knew that for this, he wouldn't dare lie. 

"You were so innocent. So young. It was something a child should never have to go through. I felt everything you felt. You had  _feelings,_ as a human would. I realized that maybe the world isn't just categorized in just good or evil. There is something that happened to you that made you the way that you are. I will not try and say I know what that is. But I will say that I am sorry."

Alexander looked surprised for a moment. "I knew that you were different. You are not a very young Warlock- not to offend- but you feel everything so strongly. I have never met anyone to feel as you do. Only one person."

"And who might that've been?"

Alexander was quiet a moment. It was one of those moments in a movie where everyone is on the edge of their seat, ready for the release that an answer would bring them. 

But an answer didn't come. 

Instead, Alexander was gone within the blink of an eye. There one minute. Gone the next. 

Magnus huffed out an annoyed breath. "Bullshit. I call bullshit! And why did he even start a fire if he wasn't going to be here to put it out? Rude, rude demons. Everywhere. Rude demons everywhere."

Magnus flicked his wrist and the fire was gone. He pushed himself deeper into the cushions of the seat. "Rude, hot demons."

 

_Flames were licking the top of the ceiling. Magnus watched in fear, but in awe as the flames built a wall. Until, of course, he noticed what the flames were surrounding, who they were trapping in._

_"W-What is happening? Mr., please, help me."_

_Magnus was helpless. He threw out his hands, feeling his magic well up right underneath his palms. But it didn't come pouring out. It was as if his magic was taunting him, lighting the soft skin of his palms but not doing anything. It tickled as it moved._

_Alexander's voice pulled him back. "Help! Please, they hurt. Do something!"_

_Magnus looked around the room, but he was in some sort of shed. There was nothing._

_Magnus looked back at Alexander who was crouched in the middle of the room, flames dancing around him, tears streaming from his swollen eyes. The same hazel eyes. "I'm sorry. I'm trying. What can I use?"_

_Alexander shook his head. "There's nothing. Nothing. I will die here."_

_Magnus felt determination well up inside of him, more useful than his magic. "No you won't. You won't die- I won't let you. I will save you."_

_There was no hope in Alexander's eyes. They didn't light up. They stayed the same- still full of tears and still full of pain. "I don't believe you."_

_Magnus moved carefully around the fire. He didn't feel the heat radiating off of it, even when he put his hand a few inches away from it. Magnus pulled his palm back from the fire, and his hand was glowing with his magic from inside of him._

_Magnus knew what he would have to do._

_He let his magic flow through him, from his head to his toes, into his fingers and through his ears._

_Alexander gasped, and Magnus looked down at himself. He was glowing blue._

_Magnus stepped through the flames, not even breaking a sweat._

_Alexander was there, on the floor, the lines of a pentagram around him. Alexander looked terrified, and maybe it was fear of Magnus, or maybe it was fear of the fire raging around them. Magnus had no idea._

_Magnus bent down, pulling Alexander into his arms. "I've got you."_

_Alexander wrapped his arms and legs around Magnus like a toddler would, sniffling into Magnus' shoulder. Magnus took a breath, before practically leaping through the flames. Alexander didn't so much as make a single peep._

_Magnus set Alexander gently on the floor, and he watched as Alexander grew up right in front of him, practically transforming into the Alexander that Magnus knew._

_Alexander touched Magnus' cheek gently, and his fingers were warm and soft. He seemed to be radiating heat, as if the fire was inside of him now. Magnus felt cold. So cold. He wanted to wrap himself around Alexander._

_"Different. You're different."_

 

Magnus woke with a jolt. 

The moon was peaking through the blinds of the loft pooling liquid silver in small little stripes around the room, and Magnus didn't know how long he'd been asleep. 

Magnus looked down at his body, but he wasn't glowing. There was no blue illumination lighting his skin. 

When he realized that he was sweating, he looked up. 

There was a fire burning in his fireplace. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> love is real and it is called malec.  
> i know that this chapter was really short. i have a bunch of stuff planned, i promise. i just didn't want to make this chapter too long, so instead i just made it too short.  
> you can nEvEr win. 
> 
> listen to this shit, guys:  
> i was adding tags and i was making one about a slow burn, right, and a suggestion came up that read:  
> "slow burn daryl dixon/rick grimes"  
> and i was shook! does anyone ship them two? because i don't wanna be hating on your OTP or anything, but i'm more of a daryl/carol gal, myself. 
> 
> -question of the day (or night). is mike wazowski winking or blinking?  
> personally, i think he's winking. but that's just me. 
> 
> a hurricane is about to touch down near me and i aM READY TO DROWN (no i am not, i need a boat and i need one fast.)
> 
> as always, kudos & comments are welcome <3
> 
> -find me on twitter @salyersbaby to get the deets (details, i'm pretty sure. i think i heard that from mean girls) for new chapters :)
> 
> all the love,
> 
> tori. <3


	3. Anger.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello there, angels <3
> 
> i don't think you guys understand. i'm so tired but sleep hates me and refuses to come. (the life of an insomniac, i suppose.)  
> as i write this it's 5:20am :)))) 
> 
> again, disclaimer: alec is not sebastian/jonathan morgenstern.  
> do not get them mixed up please :)  
> their stories are kind of the same, but really aren't. all will be explained.
> 
> so, as i've said before, this is definitely not a slow burn. not at all.  
> (just thought i should say that once more)
> 
> enjoy, angels <3
> 
> guys my room is so cold that my toes are ice but i can't put on socks because that would be weird, right? i really hope that i don't get frost bite. ;-;

It was two weeks before Magnus heard anything from Alexander. 

They'd gotten Isabelle back safe and sound, and they'd gotten a new Shadowhunter out of it. 

Sebastian was actually very charming and had pretty eyes, but Magnus couldn't help but notice that he seemed to like Alexander's eyes so much more. 

Magnus had practically just moped around. It wasn't like him to be like this. But every time he closed his eyes, Alexander haunted his dreams. Only fair for Alexander to be in his every waking thought, as well. 

There was a fair amount of teasing coming from Raphael. It was like the tables had turned and Magnus couldn't do anything about it. Normally Magnus was the one teasing Raphael because Raphael refused to admit his feelings for Simon, even to himself. 

Eventually Simon had enough and confronted Raphael, and while Magnus had been  _slightly_ terrified Raphael would actually stake Simon, they ended up kissing and it was actually really cute. 

(Magnus may or not have been shoved into the closet like a teenager because Raphael didn't want Simon to get jealous that Magnus was in his room. Magnus had ended up "accidentally" knocking one of Raphael's many jackets onto the floor, making his presence known.)

But now. Now Magnus was the one ready to grab a wooden stake and just start stabbing. Raphael was cool and all, but he was really an  _asshole._ Normally Magnus loved the fact that Raphael was straightforward and said whatever was on his mind. Magnus was the same way. But when those straightforward and non-filtered comments were turned to him... well, let's just say Magnus had been wearing  _very_ loose shirts to hide the outline of a wooden stake. 

It wasn't that Magnus couldn't take criticism. Being over four hundred years made his skin thick. He learned to take insults and turn them into compliments. 

The problem was  _Magnus._

He couldn't take his own feelings that where whirling around inside of him like a tornado. This tornado didn't cause destruction. Only devastation. There was something about Alexander. Something that made Magnus' feelings slosh around inside of him like waves crashing and receding from shore. 

Magnus was laying in bed, his phone held above his head, when he heard the distinctive  _whoosh_ of magic, and there was a warm body in the bed beside him. Magnus gasped and dropped his phone on his face. 

"Ow! Alexander, again? Are you fucking kidding me?"

Alexander giggled, grabbing Magnus' phone from where it slid off of his face and onto the bed beside him. "You should be more prepared. I was told that you're the High Warlock. Was I misinformed?"

Magnus groaned, trying to ignore the fact that Alec was  _laying_ in the bede  _beside him._ He could feel the ever present warmth radiating off of Alexander and heating his side. "No, you were not misinformed. But, Alexander if you didn't notice, it is quite early, and I am still in bed. Also, you keep poofing in here like you have some sort of business to do with me-"

Alexander turned on his side. "Oh, but I do."

Magnus sighed, turning on his side as well, facing Alexander. Their bodies were lined up so perfectly. All Magnus had to do was lean forward and they'd be kissing- nope. Not again. Before Magnus talked again, he magicked himself a minty fresh breath. "What sort of business?"

"I need to ask you more questions."

Magnus scoffed. "Really, because the last time we did this you peeled out in the middle of my question, and let me tell you, leaving a man on a cliffhanger like that is plain  _cruel_."

Alexander sighed heavily. "Fine. I'll answer your question. What was it?"

"You said that I feel everything strongly. And that you only knew one person who felt as much as I did. Who?"

Magnus could tell that Alexander really didn't want to answer the question. There was a small silence before he spoke. His voice was quiet; a hesitant note in his voice. "Me."

There was no question in Magnus' mind that that would've been the answer. But hearing it come out of Alexander's mouth made it all the more real. "I hope that you're not burdened by feelings you shouldn't feel anymore."

"Magnus, you are kind. Too kind. Why are you so kind? One day someone will take advantage of you."

Magnus shook his head. "You are still too young. You mistake my words. I'm empathetic. Not kind."

"Empathy can get you killed."

"And so can breathing. Anything can kill you. Sometimes the hardest thing to do is to live. So maybe being empathetic is  _easy._ "

Alexander touched his fingers to Magnus' forehead, but this time it was so much different. There was no rush of fear or pain. There was just the quickening of Magnus' heart and the scattering of his mind. "So different. Why are you such a mystery, Magnus Bane?"

Magnus shook his head and Alexander's fingers fell away. "I wouldn't have to be a mystery if someone was willing to discover me."

"Maybe you just haven't found the right person to do it. Or maybe you have to discover yourself first, before anyone else can."

Magnus was shocked into silence. That  _actually made sense._ "You- you're different too."

"Why, because I'm a demon with feelings?"

Magnus shook his head. "Well, maybe. But because you're not a demon at all."

"Then what am I?"

"Misunderstood."

Alexander sighed. "Maybe you're right. And maybe this is crazy talk." 

"I must be a crazy person to understand crazy talk so well. Alexander, what are you really here for?" 

Alexander turned around and sat up, pulling his legs to his body and sitting criss cross on Magnus' silken red sheets. Alexander was wearing a black sweater that held tight to his strong biceps and his broad shoulders, and dark blue skinny jeans. His shoes were already on the floor, and his feet were socked in regular long black socks. 

A bit of a lost opportunity, if you ask Magnus. 

Magnus was wearing only a pair of sweatpants, his upper body nude. He _had_ been sleeping. When Magnus sat up he saw Alexander's eyes catch on his bare chest, the golden skin there, and then Alexander was looking down at his hands in his lap, a rosy blush high on his cheeks. 

A demon.  _Fucking blushing._

Weird. 

Magnus was all sat up, all of his attention on Alexander. 

Alexander cleared his throat, before looking up at Magnus with clear hazel eyes. "I was sent to kill you. Your father- he sent me. That's why I left the sand there, so that you would summon me. I busted her necklace. But I didn't mess with her. That blonde Shadowhunter showed up before I could ask anything about you and I had to leave. But, Magnus, I can't kill you."

"What will Asmodeus do if you  _don't_ kill me?"

Alexander shrugged. "I don't know. I already live in hell. I doubt there's much anyone can do to me."

"Darling, just because you're a Greater Demon doesn't mean you can't die. There's a spot, right there-" Magnus went to touch a spot on Alexander's sternum where a pea sized area would reside, to the left of where his heart would've been. Magnus gasped in surprise when he felt Alexander's quick heartbeat beneath the tips of his fingers. Magnus moved two fingers to Alexander's neck, and he felt the pulse of a heart beneath his fingers. "I don't understand."

Alexander was watching Magnus carefully. "What?"

Magnus shook his head. "Don't freak out for just a moment."

Alexander just nodded. He stiffened a bit as Magnus slipped his hand underneath his sweater, but didn't swat Magnus away. Magnus rested a hand right over where he'd felt the heartbeat, and sure enough, it was beating, quick but steady. 

Magnus didn't let himself think about why Alexander's heart was beating so fast. Instead he slipped his hand from out of Alexander's shirt. "Demons don't have hearts. Literally. There is absolutely no way for a demon to have a heart beat. Who really are you, Alexander?"

Alexander shifted a bit so that his knees were almost touching Magnus'. "The vision. Have you ever looked closely at the chi-at me?"

"Well, yes."

Alexander shook his head. "You haven't or else you'd be having a mental breakdown at the moment. Let me show you the vision again. This time you'll understand Magnus. You must  _focus._ "

Magnus didn't want to see the vision again. He didn't want to see Alexander have to go through it again. Before Alexander's hands could touch down on his forehead, Magnus grabbed Alexander's wrist. "Don't show me all of it. It hurts."

Alexander nodded, and set his fingers gently on Magnus' forehead when Magnus finally let his fingers fall from Alexander's wrist. 

Magnus snapped his eyes shut when the vision settled again, and this time Magnus  _really_ looked at Alexander. 

Was that- a rune? 

Yes. On his neck. A deflect rune. 

Before Magnus had to hear Little Alexander screaming, the vision was cut off, and Alexander's fingers retreated. 

Magnus looked at Alexander, his mouth hung open, dumbfounded. "A Shadowhunter? How is it possible?"

"You have past stories. So do I. But I don't know if you're ready to hear this one."

Magnus shrugged. "There's only one way to find out. You have to tell me."

Alexander bit his lip before nodding. "My name is Alexander Gideon Lightwood."

Magnus held up a hand. "Did you just-"

"Lightwood. Yes. You heard me right. Anyways, my Mother found out about me- my secret. I barely even knew myself. I was only twelve."

Magnus waited patiently even if he  _really_ wanted to know what this secret was. 

"I'm gay. That's my secret. My Mother and Father were so ashamed to be raising me. To them I was some sort of abomination. I should be killed. Just like demons. So they made that pentagram. They sent me to hell- to Edom. My punishment wasn't just being sent there. I still feel as a human would. But no one- no one believes me. I'm just a demon. A Greater Demon, too."

Magnus did something that he normally would've never done. He wrapped Alexander in a hug, pulling him to his chest. Alexander melted into the hug. He was warm, and his body fit so well against Magnus' own. 

Alexander's palms flattened out on Magnus' shoulder blades, sending chills down Magnus' spine. 

Magnus pulled away, looking into Alexander's shifting hazel eyes. Magnus saw the beginnings of stubble on Alexander's chin, and he realized that he wanted to feel the pricks of Alexander's hair against his lips. Beneath his fingers. 

It was like there was a magnet. Magnus was being yanked forward, slowly but surely. The closer he got, the more the pull tightened. And right before their lips touched, it was as if someone had flipped the poles of the magnet to the same side. 

The screech of Magnus' doorbell rang throughout the building. 

Magnus groaned, pulling away. "I knew that there was something I forgot to do. It was destroy that fucking doorbell."

Alexander chuckled, a blush still present on his cheeks. "Who is it?"

Magnus shrugged. "No clue. Stay here?"

Alexander nodded, and on the way to the door, Magnus magicked on a t-shirt. This one read out 'FABULOUS' in silver glitter. 

Magnus pushed the button. "WHO DARE DISTURB THE HIGH WARLOCK OF BROOKLYN?"

There was the sound of someone clearing their throat on the other side. "It's Jocelyn. I need to talk to you about something."

Magnus sighed but buzzed her in. There was no use in arguing with Jocelyn Fairchild. All she would do was keep fighting against him until he gave up and let her in. 

Jocelyn Fairchild had hair full of fire and determination that burned just as hot. She would do anything for her daughter- Clary- and Magnus knew that. 

Magnus just didn't understand why  _he_ was invovled. There was no reason for him to keep being dragged into to Shadowhunter business unless it was absolutely necessary- which in most cases it wasn't. The Shadowhunters  _needed_ Downworlders, but were too prejudiced to notice. 

Magnus knew that Jocelyn didn't feel the same way. She was in love with a werewolf. 

But that didn't mean that she still didn't abuse her "superior powers" and hold them against Magnus- even by accident. All of the Shadowhunters. 

All but Isabelle Lightwood. 

_Lightwood? Fuck, how didn't I make the connection?  Alexander and Isabelle are siblings. What does that mean for Isabelle? Why doesn't she remember her older brother at all?_

Of course, the answer was right in front of him. You can take memories away easily. 

All you needed was a warlock. 

"Why are you here, Jocelyn?" Magnus asked as soon as she entered the loft. 

Jocelyn rolled her eyes- and Magnus wanted to kick her out already. "Nice to see you too, Magnus. I'm here to talk about that demon you summoned."

"Alexander?"

Jocelyn shrugged. "Sure. Already on a first name basis with him, huh?"

Magnus scoffed, anger welling up behind his sternum. "Remember, Jocelyn Fairchild, that you are in my home. What about Alexander?"

"How could you let him get out? He's going to try and kill Clary now. I know that she tried to do the rune and it didn't work. Do you really think that a heartless creature would spare my daughter? You need to find him, and you need to send him back to where he came from." 

Magnus crossed his arms over his chest. "I don't  _have_ to do anything for you. You wouldn't enough money to pay me even if I had agreed. But I don't agree. Alexander is a Greater Demon. His power supersedes even mine. There is nothing I can do for you."

"Oh, I know that there is. You can't just tell me no! I have money, Magnus. Isn't that all that you need?"

Magnus had to reign in his anger. "Despite what you might think, I can say no to you all that I want. Whether it be about putting Alexander back in  _hell_ or snatching your daughters memories right from her head. I can do as I please."

"Is it because he's a demon like you? I strongly doubt that you'll ever even remember him. He's nothing."

Magnus gasped, a burning rage that Magnus had never felt before bubbling up around him. "How could you-"

Everything happened so fast after that. It was like a blur. 

Alexander was across the room with an inhuman like speed, pushing Jocelyn up against the door of Magnus' loft, his hand wrapped around her throat. Jocelyn was scratching at Alexander's hand, and her face had already begun to redden. 

She was choking. 

And Magnus watched with wide eyes and an open mouth as Alexander plunged his hand into Jocelyn's chest like he was dipping it into water. He pulled his hand back out, and it was covered in blood, so dark it was almost black. 

Jocelyn slid to the floor, and Alexander stood, breathing heavily, before turning to look at Magnus.

His eyes were fully black. 

Alexander must've read the fear on Magnus' face, because his eyes shifted back to their normal color, and he looked down at his hand in shock. 

The fear dissipated when Magnus saw tears well up in Alexander's eyes. One slipped down his cheek, and another fell from his other eyes. 

Alexander sat on the floor, his butt hitting the ground with a loud  _smack_ , before he was setting his head in between his knees. 

Magnus was still shocked into silence, his eyes on Jocelyn who was laying sideways on the floor, her eyes opened wide, blood pouring from the wound in her chest and pooling in a puddle of crimson. 

Alexander looked up at Magnus. "What did I just do?"

Magnus didn't know what to say back. He'd obviously just killed Jocelyn.  _Clearly_. 

So Magnus didn't say anything. He walked over to Alexander got down on his knees beside him. Magnus wrapped his arms around Alexander. "I'm here. Your secret is safe with me."

In no time was Alexander melting into the embrace and sobbing into Magnus' arms. 

_Now, what to do with the body?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> was it really super obvious that jocelyn was going to die? but wHO WILL THE NEXT BE??
> 
> i wROTE THIS OFF OF NO SLEEP IGNORE ANY IDIOTIC MISTAKES AND LAUGH AT ME :)))  
> edit: i took a two hour nap lET'S GET IT
> 
> do you guys ever feel nervous for absolutely no reason? like your stomach is unsettled? i don't know, but i'm feeling that today. weird. 
> 
> i keEP WRITING ALEC INSTEAD OF ALEXANDER AND I WANT TO SCREAM
> 
> question of the day (or night):  
> how do you like your coffee?  
> i like mine with half and half and a lot of sugar because bitter coffee makes me want to cry and crying is not fun. :) 
> 
> if y'all didn't notice i made the chapter titles the seven deadly sins!!!!! so original!!!!! (not.)  
> but i'm actually really proud of myself for thinking of it, so just *insert back pat*
> 
> as always, kudos & comments are welcome <3 
> 
> -find me on twitter @salyersbaby :)
> 
> all the love,
> 
> tori. <3


	4. Covetousness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> howdy, angels!
> 
> so, a huge thank you to all the love i've been getting for this story! i'm really glad everyone is actually able to keep up with this crazy mess. 
> 
> i have been updating this one really super fast, mostly because it's really fun to write, and also because i already have my end goal in mind, and i know pretty well how i'm going to get there.  
> (for everyone who guessed... i don't think you're going to get this one, but keep trying :)) 
> 
> let's just give a sweet hail and farewell to jocelyn.  
> ave atque vale, jocelyn fairchild.  
> (i've always wanted to do that, wow.)
> 
> warnings: not-too-explicit smut. (that's the only really big thing.) also, a lot of talking about stars because i'm a hoe for constellations :)))) 
> 
> enjoy, angels <3

Magnus was informed that Jocelyn's funeral was a very reticent affair. He hadn't been there, of course, because Downworlders hadn't been allowed in. 

The unexplained death of Jocelyn Fairchild was enough to make even the bravest of Shadowhunters nervous. Jocelyn had been in the Circle. She had survived a marriage with Valentine Morgenstern, one of the biggest threats to date. And she had been found with a hole in her chest and no answers to the questions circling the Shadow World. 

_"Who did it?"_

_"Why wasn't it caught on one of the cameras?"_

_"Where was all of the blood?"_

The questions seemed to be multiplying, which also meant more people were jumping to incorrect conclusions. 

Magnus had barely left his loft, not willing to risk it. There was no blood on his hands but he was the one who portaled Jocelyn back to the Institute. Magnus was the one who cleaned Alexander's hands after. 

Magnus was the one who kept his mouth shut. 

Alexander hadn't been around again. It had been over a month. Magnus had been waiting and waiting, even willing to let his guard down to give Alexander a good laugh when he  _did_ show up. 

There was nothing.

No fire that lit themselves. No dreams. 

Magnus' thoughts had been full of Alexander. That didn't change. But the dreams, the ones that held Alexander and the pentagram, stopped coming. Which just assented to Magnus' already drawn conclusion. 

Alexander was sending him those dreams. 

It was possible. And now that Alexander had practically disappeared, the dreams went with him. 

That would've made anyone suspicious. 

And Magnus wasn't anyone. He wasn't just suspicious. He was terrified. 

Asmodeus said that Magnus needed to be killed. Ended. Yet, here Magnus was. Alive and well. So what happened to Alexander? Did he die? Was he banished down to hell?

Magnus might never know. 

But Magnus did have Clary coming over in a few hours. He had to make sure everything was in pristine condition- that there was not a spec of anything out of place. Because that would leave Clary to be suspicious.

And suspicion led to bad things. 

So Magnus tried to make everything look clean, but normal, so that it wasn't  _over_ cleaned to where everything was shiny- and if Raphael was here he'd slap Magnus in the back of the head and announce that he was thinking to much. 

And Magnus was. 

This was  _Clary._

She was one of the most unobservant people Magnus had ever met, and Magnus planned to use that to his advantage. 

Magnus sat on his balcony seat, watching people walk through the street, running around like little ants. 

Sometimes Magnus just liked to look at the two different worlds that he lived in. The mundanes were there roaming around, not a care in the world. And then there were the Downworlders. They walked along with the crowd, but the mundanes couldn't see the  _real_ them. The mundanes saw what they wanted. And then there were Shadowhunters. Most of them weren't visible to the mundanes at all, and the only reason Magnus could see who was a Shadowhunter was their one color wardrobe consisting of black and only black. The Shadowhunters paid no mind to the mundanes  _or_ the Downworlders. 

Magnus could say that out of every person out there, the one person he wanted to see was most definitely  _not_ out there. 

He knew that he was being stupid. If he stayed hung up on Alexander and held out a hope, when Alexander didn't come back, it would hurt Magnus so much more that it would've if Alexander had just told him to fuck off. 

Magnus saw a mop of red hair crossing the street, and he magicked a drink into his hand, fixing up a piece of his hair. 

He knew he was maybe a bit  _too_ dressed up for some people's standards, but then again, Magnus was dressing for himself and only himself. 

Magnus flicked his wrist and the front door to his loft opened, and Clary stepped in, not even glancing around the loft, but instead going to sit by Magnus without so much as a peep. 

Magnus turned his head to the side to look at Clary. She looked good, considering she just recently lost her mom. But Magnus figured that's what a good support system did to a girl. 

Her orange hair was back to its vivid color and it was almost as red as almost fully set sun. Her emerald eyes looked almost calculating as she looked at all of the buildings trapping them in. 

Magnus magicked a strawberry milkshake- Clary's favorite since childhood- and handed it to her. She smiled softly. "Thanks, Mags. I'm sorry I'm being so quiet. Just thinking."

Magnus nodded. "This is a pretty good spot to go if you want to think. A penny for your thoughts?"

Clary's green eyes turned hot and Magnus knew what was about to come out of her mouth. "It was him. I know that it was him. I swear on the Angel, Magnus, if I find him, I will kill him."

Magnus didn't say anything. Just watched the streets below. The movement never slowed, was always flowing, always constant, like a stream. 

"I can't believe we were dumb enough to summon a Greater Demon."

Magnus drummed his finger on his leg. "We don't know for sure that it was Alexander. If we jump to conclusions, someone might end up getting hurt even if it wasn't their fault."

Clary took a long drink of her milkshake. "I want to find him. And I want to kill him."

Magnus had to admit- she was determined. But he wouldn't let her kill Alexander. There was no chance of that. "Like I said, let's not jump to conclusions, biscuit. You could get hurt."

Clary turned to face Magnus, desperation in her eyes. "Don't you get it? That's the whole problem! With that demon being out there, I don't feel safe. I  _have_ to kill him. And Jace will help me."

Magnus sniffed, taking a long drink of his whiskey. "What about Isabelle?"

Clary shook her head. "Isabelle refuses. She says- well she said exactly what you said. But Jace and I have a plan. Or, we're working on one."

"What plan?" Magnus asked conversationally. 

Clary grinned, setting her drink on the ground. "I was hoping you'd ask. So, I'm going to track the demon using the sand that we found. It should be easy enough. Actually, Jace and I are going to track him just because  _parabatai_ tracking is stronger, but I'm going to be the one to do it. Jace said that it was my honor because the demon killed my mom."

"That's a good plan. I do hope it works out for you, Clary."

Clary smiled, giving Magnus a hug and standing up. "I have to go back to the Institute, but it was really nice seeing you! Do it again soon?"

Magnus nodded with a fake smile, listening for the closing of the front door. He looked at the street below and saw Clary's fiery hair going down the street. 

It was dark by the time Clary finally disappeared far enough down the street to where Magnus couldn't see her anymore, and Magnus groaned, covering his eyes with his hands. What would he do?

Instead of doing what he  _should_ be doing and thinking of a plan, Magnus instead looked up at the stars. They were constantly there, a stability that Magnus could always lean on. 

Even if his entire life was falling apart, the stars were always in the sky. Even if with each passing day they got duller. They were there. And that was what mattered. 

Magnus must've been looking up at the stars for a good ten minutes when he felt a dip in the couch beside him. 

He didn't look to see who it was. He could just smell Alexander, the slightest scent of fire, but mostly the smell of chocolate. Magnus wondered why that was. "I didn't know if you were coming back."

Alexander didn't say anything. Just wrapped his hand in Magnus' intertwining their fingers. 

He was there. That was what mattered.

"I missed you," Magnus said softly. 

There was nothing. And then, "I missed you too."

Magnus finally turned to look over at Alexander. 

His hair black hair was messy, some of it sticking up, some of it falling onto his forehead. His hazel eyes were trained on the stars. The silver from the moon pooled in his full bottom lip, and Magnus wanted to kiss him. 

He wanted to kiss him more than he wanted to do anything. 

"I needed to get everything sorted before I could come see you again."

Magnus just watched Alexander watch the sky. "I don't want you to leave me again. Not like that, Alexander. I was so scared that something happened. That you were never coming back."

Alexander squeezed Magnus' hand. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry I left you. I had to. It was to keep myself safe just as much as it was to keep you safe. I couldn't live with myself for the rest of eternity if I'd done anything to hurt you."

"You didn't. You didn't hurt me. Don't think about the could've. Not anymore, Alexander. Not us."

Alexander finally,  _finally_ turned to look at Magnus. His face looked so serene beneath the night sky. It was as if Alexander was meant to be upon the stars. "Us. I like that."

Magnus reached his free hand out, touching Alexander's cheek softly. The stubble was rough beneath his fingers. Magnus' voice was a touch of fresh air. "Kiss me. Please."

Alexander grabbed Magnus' wrist that was on his face, bringing Magnus' palm to his lip and kissing it so gently, like the touch of a flower petal. 

Magnus shook his head. "Kiss  _me_."

Alexander leaned forward, so close that Magnus could feel his warm breath ghosting across his face. Alexander's lips touched gently upon Magnus' own, and they fit together like a puzzle. Alexander's lips were so soft, and they seemed to hold some of the fire that Alexander was always carrying inside of them. 

The kiss was simple. Gentle. But Magnus wanted to much more.  _So much._ He chased Alexander's lips, carding his fingers through the soft, short hair at the nape of Alexander's neck. Magnus tugged gently, before attacking Alexander's mouth with his own. 

Magnus slid his tongue on the seam of Alexander's lips, and Alexander opened willingly. 

There were so many things wrong with this. But none of them even came close to the fact that this was  _so right_. 

Magnus pulled away, swallowing down a gulp of air. 

"I want more. I want all of you, Magnus Bane."

Magnus was already breathing heavily. "I am all yours, Alexander Lightwood."

Magnus could've bottled all of the stars in the sky and they would never compare to the beauty that was Alexander Lightwood. 

Alexander stood, bringing Magnus up with him. "You look amazing, Magnus."

Magnus smiled. "I needed a change."

Magnus knew that Alexander would (hopefully) be ripping his sparkly black jacket off of him in a few minutes, but that didn't mean that Magnus couldn't look cute before. 

Magnus was about to ask how Alexander knew the way to his room and remembered that Alexander used to have a small knack for scaring the shit out of Magnus at inappropriate times and in inappropriate places. (Such as Magnus' bed.)

Alexander slid open the door to the bedroom, holding Magnus by the lapels of his jacket. Magnus walked backwards, his balance actually pretty great for a guy who was only a  _little_ bit occupied.

Magnus had his hands braced on Alec's neck, but his jacket had to come off somehow, so Magnus removed his arms only so Alexander could push his jacket away. Magnus wrapped his hands back on Alec's neck, flipping them over onto the bed, Magnus straddling Alec. 

Alexander reached his head up to snatch Magnus' lips, but Magnus leaned back. "Alexander, I have to tell you now that- sometimes when I get too... sometimes, I lose control. I don't want you to be scared."

Alexander shook his head. "Let me see. I could never-" His sentence cut off in a hitching breath when Magnus opened his eyes and they were the eyes of a cat. Gold and green with slits. 

Magnus was just about ready to remove himself from Alexanders lap, when Alexander settled his hand on Magnus' cheek. "They're beautiful.  _You_ _'re_ beautiful, Magnus. Don't be ashamed to be who you are."

Magnus let himself be pulled back down, and he fit his lips against Alec's again, their mouths two pieces of the same puzzle. How could something so right ever be wrong? 

After attempting to pull each other's clothes off, Magnus just sighed, snapping his fingers and using his magic so they were in just boxers. 

Alexander sighed. "No fair."

"Who said I didn't play dirty? Now stop talking and  _kiss me._ "

Alexander smiled beneath Magnus cupping Magnus' face in his big hands. "Your wish is my command."

 

Magnus made sure everything was perfect for his Alexander. He made sure that his touches lingered long enough to make Alexander whimper and that he was always, always giving Alexander some sort of contact. 

They rose and fell together, moving as one. The only sound that was in the room were the ones the both of them were making together. 

It was beautiful and it was peaceful, and it made Magnus feel  _special_. 

They both hit their wall together, pushing over the edge with a whimper of the other's name. 

Magnus laid out on the bed beside Alexander wrapping his body around Alexander, creating a web of their intertwined legs. 

They both caught their breaths in silence. 

Magnus felt Alexander's hand searching for his, and he held on tight to Alexander, bringing Alexander's hand up to his mouth and kissing his knuckles. 

The darkness began to claim Magnus, slowly but surely, making his eyes droop and his body relax. "Goodnight, Alexander."

"Goodnight, Magnus."

The moon spilled through the open slits in the window and over the both of them, making the sweat on their bodies shine like glitter. 

The last thought that flitted across Magnus' mind was that he would do anything to protect the man beside him.  _Anything._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> like i said:  
> NOT A SLOW BURN :)  
> (lowkey mooched a lot of sh quotes, but it's ok. they deserved a perfect sex scene.)
> 
> so, i want to hear everyone's theories on who's going to die.  
> oh, by the way, that's what's coming the next chapter.  
> o n e w i l l d i e  
> (that was really fun but also hard to do, *pat on the back*)
> 
> (2nd) question of the day (or night):  
> what's your favorite song?  
> at the moment, mine is where's my love by syml, or habits of my heart by jaymes young
> 
> because i've been feeling so nervous and on edge today, i wrote a lot because it calms me better than anything else. so enjoy the rapid fire updates :)
> 
> i blame any mistakes on this killer headache i have right now.  
> (headaches suck ass, ugh. ;-;)
> 
> as always, kudos & comments are much appreciated <3
> 
> all the love, 
> 
> tori. <3


	5. Pride.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi angels!
> 
> so. this is the chapter where ONE WILL DIE!  
> i'm going to get so many people with pitch forks coming at me for this :) 
> 
> again, magnus takes no ones shit.
> 
> warnings: death & eMOTIONS!!  
> (that's all, folks)
> 
> enjoy, angels <3
> 
> if i write alec, please feel free to make fun of me in the comments.  
> i swear i write alec & then have to change it EVERY TIME.

Magnus was expecting to be alone when he woke up. It wasn't because he thought Alexander would be ashamed and leave him in the middle of the night. Magnus knew Alexander was busy. That was all. 

But when Magnus woke up in Alexander's arms, he felt his heart leap out of his chest.

There was something about being wrapped around the one person you've wanted to be with. It made Magnus want to hold on and never let go. Just lay there forever and ever. 

It was possible to do that. Him and Alexander were both immortal. If they wanted to, they could lay there for eternity. (Although, Magnus didn't really want to. He liked to shower.)

But Magnus knew that Alexander would eventually have to leave. It was impossible for him to be in New York for as long as he wanted. Alexander would have to go back to Hell. And soon, probably, seeing as he didn't follow the one rule he had and kill Magnus. 

There was something so peaceful about Alexander's face when he slept. His face was softened and his mouth was tipped up at the corners as if he was laughing aloud in his dream. His eyes moved behind his eyelids with nameless dreams; dreams that Magnus could only hope that he starred in. Magnus knew that Alexander was the main character of his own dreams. 

Magnus had been in love. So many times before. He had loved and loved. He had lost. But this was different. Him and Alexander could really be together. Except for the part about Alexander supposed to bring Magnus' head to his father on a dinner platter. 

As long as it was fine china, Magnus really didn't see the issue. 

Magnus thought for a moment. Alexander was a Lightwood. And something told Magnus that Alexander  _knew_ Isabelle was his little sister and Jace was his little brother. Isabelle and Jace had their memories wiped but Alexander most definitely did not have his wiped. Or else he would have no recollection of the night that he'd been taken down to Hell. 

Alexander was a mystery. Everything about him screamed mysterious.

Magnus had always been weak for mysteries.

Magnus decided that laying in bed and watching Alexander sleep might be a bit weird, so Magnus gently slipped himself from Alexander's hold, watching him moan sadly and grab Magnus' pillow to hold onto.

It made Magnus heart soar.

Magnus slipped on a shirt and sweatpants, looking one last time at Alexander. His dark hair was messy, his cheeks flushed with sleep, lips parted with breaths. His smooth skin was drenched in the bright sun, turning the fine, dark hairs on his chest to gold.

He was an angel trapped in a demon's world, and more than anything, did Magnus want to free that angel.

Magnus pushed out of his room, shutting the door quietly behind himself. He was making pancakes.

 

Magnus worked on the pancakes, falling easily into the actions of pouring, waiting, flipping, waiting, taking it off, and repeating. Magnus was sure that the hardest part about making pancakes was not eating them, because _fuck_ , those pancakes smelled amazing. Magnus couldn't believe that it hadn't woken Alexander up yet.

Maybe Alexander really needed the sleep. Magnus could tell that last night was the first night that Alexander had ever had sex. It wasn't a big deal that he was a virgin. He had been sent to Hell when he was about twelve- and that was a very young age to lose your virginity, even for Shadowhunter's who find love early in life.

Magnus had- of course- made chocolate chip pancakes, because they were so much better, and it was only the best for his Alexander.

Magnus didn't know when he decided that Alexander was his. Maybe when he found out that Alexander would rather have himself beat and tortured rather than kill Magnus. Maybe it was when they spent a night in each other's arms.

There was one problem with Magnus letting down his walls. Eventually, his heart would be broken, when Alexander was forced to leave. There was no question about that. You would think that when a wall fell it would be harder to put up- so that you could make it better; sturdier- but Magnus had walls up quickly after Camille. But Alexander was so different. So honest. So unsure. When you looked in his eyes, you could tell _exactly_ what he was feeling. 

There weren't many people who could show you so much and so little at the same time, and that was what was so mysterious about the beautiful boy.

"Making pancakes?"

Magnus jumped, almost dropping the scooper into the pancake batter. Magnus groaned, turning his head to the side to glare at Alexander. "You're such an ass! I'm trying to be nice and make you breakfast, and there you go again, screwing with me!"

Alexander smiled, and Magnus was breathless for a moment. Magnus could say for sure, out of every place and country he'd been to, he'd never seen something as beautiful as Alexander with a smile on his face. "You're just so easy!"

Magnus gasped. "Is that what you think of me?"

Alexander's face morphed, and he looked mortified. "No! No, Magnus I didn't mean it _that_ way. If-if anyone's easy, it's probably me, I mean-"

Magnus settled one of his fingers in front of Alexander's lips, looking up in those beautiful hazel eyes. "Stop. I was just kidding, darling." Magnus moved his finger away, watching as Alexander's face morphed into a small smile. "Anyways, I bet you don't know how long I wanted you in my bed- and not to talk with me. I have never met someone who is literally the definition of the word oblivious until I met you."

Alexander flushed, but looked down with a smile painting his lips. "So what if I am oblivious. You seem the type to like that, if I'm not wrong?"

Magnus shook his head, a smirk on his face. "You most definitely are not wrong. I like a challenge."

"Was I that hard of a challenge? I came here pretty quickly, if I do recall. The same night that I met you, I just showed up in your living room."

Magnus grinned. "You sure do remember that well. Made that good of an impression on you? Anyways, we have some stuff to talk about today. But first, pancakes."

 

Magnus was proud to say that his pancakes were most definitely a hit. Alexander ate about seven of them, and then he looked at the empty plate like if he stared at it long enough more would appear. 

"It seems like you enjoyed my pancakes," Magnus said, standing up and grabbing Alexander's plate. Alexander looked down at the table with a small smile on his lips, a blush high on his cheeks. 

Magnus set the plates into the sink, before reaching a hand out for Alexander to take. Alexander grabbed Magnus' hand and Magnus felt his heart damn near explode out of his chest. He felt like he was full of the color pink, and he knew that pink was floating in his cheeks. 

Alexander stood up alongside Magnus, and he followed Magnus into the living room. Magnus dropped Alexander's hand, and he was almost grateful when Alexander went to sit on the sofa across from him instead of beside him. Magnus needed some space to talk about what he needed to talk to Alexander about. 

Magnus just watched Alexander a moment. Magnus didn't know how someone could be so beautiful. It was like staring right at the sun. 

"Okay. First thing I want to talk about is my father. Why were you sent to kill me? Is there a specific reason for it?" 

Alexander looked down at his fingers in his lap for a moment, his teeth sunken into his bottom lip. After a moment of quiet, he nodded. "He wanted his son back. He said that you were gone too long, and that he missed you. I am his trusty side kick, and I was sent to put you back in hell. I guess neither of us were prepared for you to be this charming."

Magnus smiled when Alexander's cheeks flushed. "Why, thank you. He does know that there are other ways for him to bring me down there than killing me, right?"

Alexander nodded. "Yeah. But he wanted to make you suffer, but not right from his hands. I guess he wanted to make himself look like the hero. But he's not a hero. He's horrible. Evil."

Magnus tapped his fingers on his bare wrist. "I've known that my whole life. But, I just don't understand why he sent you. It makes no sense."

Alexander shifted a bit, squirming in his seat. "Because you know my sister and brother. You are close to them. And he wanted to hurt me, but not in such obvious ways. So the temptation of meeting my siblings are always hanging right in front of my face."

Magnus knew exactly what his afternoon was going to consist of. "Let's go see Isabelle Lightwood."

 

Getting Alexander into the institute posed as a bit of an issue. He had demon blood, and Magnus was pretty sure that the wards on the institute blocked any demon-blooded creature from entering.

The upside to this was that Magnus had created the wards, therefor he could take them down too.

Magnus stood a bit away from the institute- far enough away that no one would be able to see him undo the protective wards- so he could work. Alexander was there as well, but he was standing a bit away, pulling nervously on his fingers and gnawing on his bottom lip like a teething baby. 

Magnus wanted to pull Alexander into his arms and tell him that it would be fine, that Isabelle would love him just as he loved her, but Magnus couldn't promise that, even if he wanted to more than anything. Instead of giving Alexander any sort of false hope, Magnus continued to remove his wards, layer after layer. He could allow Alexander to portal in. (Magnus would create the portal and put himself through first. If there was a Shadowhunter anywhere around, Magnus would shut the portal. If not, Magnus would leave the portal open and allow Alexander in.)

Once the wards had been stripped away, Magnus turned with a flourish, looking behind himself to Alexander, who was leaning up against the wall of the alleyway, his head pressed back into the bricks, black hair flopping around his forehead. Magnus could see from where he was that Alexander's eyes were screwed shut. 

Magnus walked over to Alexander, resting one of his hands on Alexander's warm cheek, just letting it sit there. Alexander didn't open his eyes, but leaned his head onto Magnus' palm, resting his cheek in Magnus' hand. Magnus felt his heart twist and turn in his chest, his stomach flipping upside down. He was so nervous for Alexander, so much so that it hurt. 

Magnus leaned forward and gently pressed his lips against Alexander's in a chaste kiss. It was an unspoken promise that Magnus would be there the whole way, in Alexander's mind and on his lips. "Good luck," Magnus said into Alexander's cheek, before pulling away and opening a portal to the hallway outside of Isabelle's room. 

Magnus stood in the dark hallways, his eyes searching through them for any Shadowhunter that could possibly be loitering around. There was no one. Magnus quickly knocked on Isabelle's door, and almost gasped in relief when it was just her who opened it. 

"Magnus?"

Magnus grabbed Isabelle's hand gently. "I have someone you need to meet. Keep an open mind, yeah?"

There was one trait of Isabelle's, out of all of her other amazing ones, that was making Magnus want to kiss her at the moment. She didn't ask questions. 

Isabelle just nodded, and pulled the door open. Magnus entered her room, and he smiled when he saw Alexander poof into the room looking around the purple-ish room with dazed eyes. Alexander saw Magnus, and all of the tension residing in his shoulders seemingly floated away, and he all but sagged in relief. Until, of course, Alexander caught sight of Isabelle. 

Magnus walked over to Alexander, dropping a comforting hand onto his bicep. Alexander smiled gratefully at Magnus, before looking up and noticing Isabelle's dark brown- almost black- eyes focused on the two of them. Her eyes were unreadable, but there were a torrent of emotions running through her face, a small twitching down of her lip, the pulling together of her dark eyebrows. 

Isabelle shut the door. "Who is this?"

Magnus heaved a breath. "This is Alexander. He's your brother. I'm going to leave the two of you to speak."

Isabelle's mouth had popped open into an O, but her eyes weren't focused on Magnus. They were running over Alexander, taking all of him in. Magnus could see the beginning of tears gathering in her eyes. 

Magnus turned to face Alexander. "You'll be okay. And if you need me, just send me any sort of message."

Alexander looked desperately at Magnus for a moment, before pulling himself together with obvious force. "Okay. Be-be careful. I'll see you later."

Magnus kissed Alexander quickly on the lips, ignoring Isabelle's questioning eyes. Magnus patted Isabelle sweetly on the shoulder before walking out of the room, closing the door carefully behind himself. He prayed to Lilith that Alexander would be okay, and that he wouldn't have his heart broken.  

 

  
Magnus rapped gently on the door he knew would lead into Clary's room, using just his knuckles. He'd told Clary that he would be coming by, and she got very exited, talking about a plan. Magnus had a hunch for what the plan was about, and he wasn't very excited.

The door opened, and Clary was standing in the doorway, her orange hair situated around her face. A huge smile painted her lips- which added with the maniac look in her eyes- and Magnus was ready to walk back to Alexander and take him the hell away from that building and never look back. There was something holding Magnus back, though- whether it be the fact that Alexander was about to really talk to his sister for the first time, or that Magnus didn't know exactly what Clary's plan was, Magnus didn't know.

"Hi, Magnus. Come in, come in. I have a lot to tell you!" Clary backed away from the door, waving Magnus into the room.

Magnus walked it, the hairs on his neck prickling uncomfortably, his magic thrumming relentlessly through his veins, demanding attention. "Hey, Clary. What do you need to tell me?"

Clary shut the door behind herself, gesturing to the bed, sitting down beside Magnus. "I have a plan."

Magnus nodded. "So I've heard. About what, exactly?"

"Well, today is the day that Jace and I are going to track the demon. It took a few days for us to get enough sand from the scene we'd found it at. It seemed as if someone had went and cleaned it all up. Anyways, we finally got the perfect amount to actually be able to track him. The main reason I needed you here was so you could keep everyone else protected. I don't want this  _thing_ to escape again."

It was all Magnus could do to not defend Alexander to Clary. That would give everything away. "That's a good plan. Have you told Isabelle about it?"

Clary's face fell, and she bit down so hard on her lip it turned white. "That is another reason I needed you. I wanted you to help me tell her. She'd- she'd understand if it was you telling her. If it was me it'd just be vengeance."

Magnus didn't say anything about the face that is  _was_ vengeance. She was avenging her Mother's death. There was nothing else. And Magnus would do anything to keep Clary away from Alexander. 

"Maybe we just shouldn't tell Izzy. Or we just shouldn't do it," Magnus said, as normally as he could. 

Clary just looked at him with sad emerald eyes. "I have to, Magnus. For my mom. You've known her for longer than I have. You should want this too."

Magnus shook his head. "Not for someone who didn't do it. This isn't fair, Clary. I won't help."

Clary stood, her face cold. "I'll go tell Isabelle alone, then. I'm going to find him, and I will kill him, with or without you."

Magnus stood as well, and he could feel magic pulsing through his veins like another heartbeat. "I'm afraid I can't let you do that, Clary."

 

**

 

Alexander felt his stomach tighten when Isabelle took a deep breath, and his stomach flew into his throat when she exhaled that breath. The tingling that Magnus' kiss had left on Alexander's lips had started to dull, his entire body instead thrumming with nerves. 

"My brother?" Isabelle said quietly, looking at Alexander like she was trying to solve a puzzle. Alexander figured that she was. There were still probably some memories residing in her mind. 

Alexander nodded. "I'm your brother. When I was twelve, Maryse and Robert sent me to Edom. They found out that I was gay, and they decided they couldn't have an abomination as a son. So they treated me as such."

Alexander felt his chest tighten when he saw a tear fall from Isabelle's eye. Alexander had seen her before- in his memories- but seeing her in person made him feel a brotherly love through all of his body, and he just wanted to give his sister a hug. He couldn't, though. He wasn't even allowing himself to hope for her to believe him. 

"I'm- I'm so sorry. My big brother." Isabelle walked forward, her steps determined but her eyes hesitant. Alexander didn't move from his spot. 

Isabelle stood a foot away from Alexander, looking up at him. She lifted up her left hand, slowly moving it to Alexander's face. Alexander didn't move, and Isabelle gently set her palm on Alexander's cheek. Alexander let a tear slip from his eye. This was his little sister. The sweet girl who loved everyone equally despite what they had running through their veins. 

 

"Our parents- how could they do this to you? To  _us_? I always felt as if I was missing something. Like there was a hole in my heart. There was a piece of me gone. And that piece was you."

Alexander felt a sob rise up in his throat, but he held it inside, watching with blurry eyes as another tear slipped from Isabelle's eyes. "Watching you grow up, it was my only source of joy. Until I met Magnus, of course."

Isabelle smiled through her tears. "I saw that kiss. Are you two dating? In loooove?"

Alexander shrugged. "I don't know. I know that I'd do anything for his happiness and to keep him safe. That's all that matters."

Isabelle nodded. "It is. That's all that matters." Isabelle moved her hand off of Alexander's cheek, wiping away her own tears. "Now, I'm not going to pretend that I understand how you have any sort of feelings. But I won't ask until you're ready to tell me. Just promise me that you'll be safe."

"I will, Isabelle. I will."

Alexander felt a part of himself fall into place when Isabelle pulled him into a hug. He was here, with his sister. Someone he never thought that he'd see again. And the whole reason that he was there was because of Magnus. 

What was that about love?

 

**

 

Magnus' magic was bright red when it came out of his fingertips. He'd seen it like that before, but he'd never used it as he was at the moment. The fiery magic wrapped itself around Clary's neck, clinging tight to her and making her gasp from the loss of oxygen. 

Her wide emerald eyes found Magnus', and she looked to be begging. 

Magnus shook his head apologetically. He really  _didn't_ want to hurt her. But he had to save Alexander. "I'm sorry. But I can't let you kill Alexander. This is the only way I know that he'll live. You have to die. Without you, Jonathan won't be able to search for my Alexander. He'll be fine. I really don't want to do this, Clarissa. You have to understand. You'd do anything for your Isabelle. I'd do anything for Alexander. Including this. It has to be done, and I have to be the one to do it."

Clary's face was getting purple, her oxygen getting cut off. Magnus felt guilt pool in his stomach, but he'd do anything for Alexander. Clary had to die; there was no other way around it. 

"I hope that you can understand. You'll be with your mother, Clary. That's what matters."

Magnus watched with a sad heart as Clary's body sagged, the life coming out of her. Magnus used his magic to set Clary gently on the floor, and he went to kneel beside her body. He pushed her eyelids closed. "Rest in peace, Clarissa Fairchild. May the Angel be with you."

Magnus walked out of Clary's room, shutting the door behind himself and locking it. He needed to go find Alexander and get the fuck out of the institute. 

Magnus just hoped that Alexander got what he needed with Isabelle. 

 

 

Magnus watched Alexander barely hold himself together. Alexander had his arms wrapped around himself, keeping everything together, even though it was so obvious his attempts were failing.

"I can't apologize for doing it, Alexander. I had to save you." 

Alexander looked up at Magnus, and there was nothing but- nothing but  _love_ in his eyes. "I know. I know, Magnus. But I can apologize. You had to-had to kill for me. I wanted to keep you away from this."

Magnus shook his head. "You can't keep me away. I want to be with you."

"I don't- I can't leave you. But I can't stay. I will be forced back and then tor- hurt for not going back," Alexander said, stubbornly keeping the tears in his eyes.

Magnus reached forward, settling his hand on Alexander's neck, brushing against Alexander's rough, stubble filled cheek with a thumb.

Alexander flinched, looking down at his hands drawn together in his lap.

For a moment, Magnus was ready to take his hand away, until Alexander leaned into the pressure of Magnus' hand, taking deep breaths as if he'd been breathing shortly until Magnus' hand was on him.

"If you can't live without me," Magnus began quietly, "then take me with you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wHO GUESSED THAT??  
> everyone was guessing maryse & robert, or sebastian (he's a good guy in this, omg) would die bUT NOPE.  
> adios, carrot.  
> (also, was the alec & izzy part okay? i know that literally everyone was asking for it, and i was already going to add it in, but i don't know how i did with it. i hope it was all you'd hoped & dreamed) 
> 
> ave atque vale, clarissa fairchild.  
> wOw that was fun even the second time. 
> 
> question of the day (or night):  
> who is your favorite fictional character?  
> personally, mine is magnus bane & carol peletier 
> 
> i'm sorry this took so long! i've been at school & tired as hell.  
> also, people are assholes & i've been trying to ward away the demons. (i haven't really succeeded)  
> the upperclassmen are so evil, i swear. 
> 
> as always, kudos & comments are welcome <3
> 
> all the love,
> 
> tori <3


	6. Gluttony.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi, angels!
> 
> wow, next chapter is the end :')))))) just ignore that, and read this!
> 
> can i just say that i really miss malec. like, really, really miss them. ugh ;-;
> 
> i should probably just rewatch, but when i see clace or climon i just get so mad & then...  
> destruction.
> 
> soooo i've been having trouble sleeping & i'm also "ill" (i just have a killer headache)  
> and i will be blaming all mistakes on the above ^
> 
> anyways, enjoy, angels <3
> 
> -if you've read the books, you know that when the crew landed in edom they got visions of their deepest desires, or whatever. that's not exactly what happened here.  
> if you haven't read the books & you have zero clue what i'm on about, carry on.

 

Magnus had never been to Hell before. Why would he want to go? That would mean he'd have to see his father, and all of the other demons who frequented the horrible place. There was absolutely  _no_ charm to the place- or the reputation that surrounded only its name. But this time, Magnus was following his heart, and he refused to let Alexander go down there alone.

So that's how Magnus found himself slaving over creating a pentagram. He didn't know how this worked, really, but he had Alexander reading over all of these different books, trying to find the solution. It had to be  _somewhere_. 

Alexander, being a Greater Demon and all, could pretty much just poof himself there. Magnus had asked that if they were holding hands- or  _another_ part of their bodies were touching- then would Magnus be able to poof down there with him. The answer had been no. 

(Although, Alexander had given Magnus a very vigorous nod of his head when the part about other body parts touching came up, but the mood had been lost for Magnus.)

There had been something itching at the back of Magnus' mind since last week when he'd killed Clary. How would that affect Isabelle? Her and Clary had been very serious- very in love. Magnus didn't like breaking Isabelle's- or Jace's- hearts, but it was easier than letting his Alexander be killed. It hadn't even been a question in Magnus' mind. It was either kill Clary and break Isabelle's heart, or kill Alexander and break his own heart. And make Isabelle lose any chance she had of meeting the big brother she'd never known she had. 

Clary's funeral, much like Jocelyn's, was a reticent affair. Clary's death had been a little bit more obvious. She had obviously been choked to death, but there had been no recordings of it. (Magnus' magic had shut off all of the live feeds and played old ones until he'd left.) 

The Shadowhunter's were still on edge, which meant that Jace Wayland was on Magnus' back more than ever. It was, of course, Magnus' fault that  _"the beast had escaped and killed my_ parabatai! _"_

Magnus didn't want to argue anymore. He was ready to just come out and say it was him so the little shit would stop blaming Alexander. 

"You know, staring at the ground won't make the pentagram draw itself," Alexander said, bumping his shoulder with Magnus'. (Alexander actually bumped his  _upper arm_ with Magnus, seeing as he was seventy-foot tall, but Magnus gave himself the benefit of the doubt.)

Magnus rolled his eyes, looking up at Alexander. "Yes, and you coming over here every five minutes to say the same sentence is also not helping."

Alexander pouted, but Magnus could see the bit of hurt flash in Alexander's shifting hazel eyes. Magnus never meant to snap, but he was just so tired of always having to feel perfect, especially in front of Alexander.

Magnus sighed, wrapping his arms carefully around Alexander's waist. Alexander, after a moment, wrapped his arms around Magnus and clung tightly to him. "I'm sorry. I've just been so frustrated recently."

Alexander held Magnus tighter, as if his arms could act as an armor for all of the feelings trying to work themselves into Magnus' heart. "I know. Magnus, I just want to tell you again that-"

Magnus pulled away, staring into Alexander's eyes with the utmost focus. "I'm going. Stop trying to make me stay. I want to go there, and be there, with you. And my father, and all of the other creatures lurking there. As long as you're by my side."

Alexander sighed. "Do your friends even know that you're leaving? Like the grumpy vampire and the annoying pale one?"

"First off, the annoying pale one is also a vampire. And second off, Raphael doesn't care. He usually celebrates when I disappear for long periods of time. Especially when I don't leave a note."

Alexander hummed. "Yes, and what about the blue nurse and the green one with horns?"

Magnus bit at his lip. He knew that he shouldn't have told Alexander about Catarina and Ragnor, but Alexander was just so easy to talk to, and Magnus loved his friends very much. "That might be a bit trickier. It's okay, though, Ragnor is always in London or wherever the hell he hides away to tune me out, and Catarina is so busy that she'll probably never notice. And even if I did tell her, she'd understand. Love is most important."

Alexander flushed. "You love me?"

Magnus shrugged, pulling away to look at the ground some more, but inwardly cursing himself. He didn't want to scare Alexander off. "I'm well on my way. Recently I've been having trouble opening my heart up. Until I met you, of course."

Alexander smiled, grabbing Magnus' hand from his side and pulling Magnus over to Alexander's chest. Alexander looked down at Magnus with eyes full of emotion. "Good to know I'm not the only one. I had never met anyone before- no one like you. I was never willing to. But, Magnus Bane, you unlocked something in me. I feel- open, I feel open. Vulnerable, maybe. But it's good. Because I know that you'll be here to hold me- o-or whatever, if I need it."

Magnus ran his fingers through the fluffy hair on top of Alexander's head, his eyes tracking the movements of his hand. "I will. Even though we'll be hot and sweaty."

Alexander flushed, and Magnus threw his head back with a laugh- what a dirty mind! "No, Alexander, because it's hot in hell. Literally  _what_ is up with you?"

"Well, you're just so pretty. And you always call me pretty. So, I figured you'd be feeling how I'm feeling."

Magnus scoffed. "You're beautiful, and no, I am not "feeling how you're feeling." I am feeling frustrated-"

"Me too!"

Magnus continued on undeterred, "-and tired. Also bored. This is fucking boring. I feel like I'm trying to figure out a puzzle that has no solution. Do you know how boring that is?"

Alexander shook his head. "No, but I can guess. And guessing is pretty easy with all the whining you keep spitting out."

"Get yourself a dog, and you'll think that I was an angel compared to  _that_."

"Personally, I'm more of a dog person. I think that cats are evil and whiney, and only want people for their food. And shelter. And water. But, those are just basic necessities."

Magnus put an offended hand over his heart, trying to process this information. "A dog person? Lilith, guide me! Away from this beast, preferably."

"What? Do you like cats? Magnus!"

Magnus pulled himself out of Alexander's embrace, plopping himself onto one of his leather love seats. "Never before have I ran into a relationship block  _this big_. I mean, there's the small fact of me being immortal that usually steers people into the other direction, but a dog person? It's going to be like living with a monkey!"

Alexander sat down beside Magnus, looking at him with unimpressed hazel eyes. "So you mean that I'll try to fling my own shit at you?"

Magnus giggled, leaning his head onto Alexander's shoulder and closing his eyes. "It's okay. If you love dogs, then I love dogs."

Alexander was silent.

"And if I love cats then..."

Alexander shook his head. "I will not say it."

Magnus pulled his head off of Alexander's shoulder. "And there goes your cuddling rights for the next one hundred years. Why do you do this to us, Alexander?"

Alexander looked deeply offended, his mouth popped open wide, like a zero. Magnus didn't feel bad one bit. "Magnus! Thats'a not fair! You can't take away cuddling for _one hundred years_ just because of a cat!"

Magnus shook his head. "It is never _just_ a cat. You know what type of people think it's just a cat? People with a fixed mindset. That's you, Alexander. You're a prime example."

Alexander smiled a moment, but his face fell. Magnus was ready to say that he'd just been joking when Alexander's soft voice hit Magnus' ears. "My family used to call me Alec. I think Alexander was too much of a mouthful- especially for little Izzy. I've always hated my full name. Until you started using it."

Magnus twisted his body to face Alexander, sitting criss cross. "I think that your full name is charming. And I don't care if you don't like cats."

"Good. Because I don't like them. If you love them, I love them."

Magnus clapped his hands, hopping up from the couch, a huge smile plastered on his face. "I knew you'd say it!" Magnus stopped moving, looking serious a moment. "Was it out of pity?"

Alexander shook his head, putting his hands up in the air. "No pity from me. Although... You know what? Never mind."

Magnus shook his head, putting his hands on his hips. "Nope. None of that. What were you going to say."

Alexander gave Magnus a look. One that Magnus could only describe as the _fuck no_ look. The next few things happened in very quick succession.

Alexander was pretending to pull a zip across his lips as if they were a zipper on a jacket, and Alexander pretended to lock it.

Magnus had never been good under pressure. You would think that at his age- which was not very old, especially not when compared to Ragnor!- Magnus would've learned how to manipulate a situation very quickly into his own favor. That was most definitely not the case.

Magnus made a spilt second decision and practically flung himself at Alexander, settling himself almost-roughly into Alexander's lap, grabbing Alexander's hand and stopping its movement. "I'm going to let you think long and hard about what you're going to do next with this imaginary key."

Alexander grinned. "I can think about something _else_ long and hard."

Magnus smiled. "Does the puppy want a bone? Anyways, what were you about to say? I really need to know. You're stressing me out thinking about it. And then after that, we get back to work. On me going to Hell, Alexander," Magnus added upon seeing Alexander's mouth opening- most likely with another terrible innuendo.

Alexander pouted. "I was going to say that I told you I love cats mostly out of pity. Okay, no, not mostly, only a little bit out of pity. Like a modicum of pity was felt during the speaking of that statement."

Magnus removed himself from Alexander's lap. "Good to know. Let's get to work."

 

There was a simple way to get Magnus to hell. He had to call upon his father. Sounded simple enough. Asmodeous was never too far. He always seemed to be waiting for Magnus- or he had when Magnus had first called to his father. Magnus hadn't dared to try a second time.

But there Magnus was taking deep breaths, readying himself to call upon the demon who created him, the man whose blood was running through Magnus' veins like a disease. When Magnus had first found out- around the same time that his mother had killed herself- he wanted to rip the blood from his veins. He wanted his eyes to be normal, like everyone else's. Magnus had to learn that he wasn't normal, and that he never would be. It was one of the hardest lessons he had to learn, and Magnus constantly had to re-teach himself.

But now Magnus had Alexander. That was what mattered at the moment. So, Magnus held Alexander's eyes for as long as he could, before beginning.

"My father, who art in hell, hallowed be thy name," the words tasted like venom, and Magnus wanted to just swallow them down and not speak them. But he couldn't- he wouldn't. "Thy kingdom come, thy will be done, in Edom as it is in Hell. Forgive not my sins, for in that fires of fires there shall be neither loving kindness, nor compassion, nor redemption. My father, who makes wars in high places and low, come to me now. I call you as your son, and incur myself the responsibility of your summoning."

It was done. The words couldn't be unspoken, Magnus could never have all that lost air back. He'd called upon his father. For the last time.

Magnus wasn't even scared when Asmodeus appeared into the middle of Magnus' living room. It made Magnus think back to when he found Alexander in his loft.

Asmodeus's eyes- the same gold-green cat eyes that Magnus himself had- found Magnus first. Asmodeus grinned, his teeth like knifes. "My son. I was wondering when you'd finally call me. It has been a while."

Magnus sighed. "Yes. Not long enough. Father-"

"Hello, Alexander. I see you've met my Magnus. I also see that you haven't finished what you need to finish, but I'm not angry. I know why I've been called here."

Magnus looked at his father long and hard for almost a full minute. "You hoped that Alexander and I would fall in love so I'd come down to Edom, didn't you?"

Asmodeus rolled his eyes. "No, I didn't hope. I don't do such a thing. I planned on you two falling in love. I know Alexander has the capacity for it. And you, my son, do as well. Just like a mundane, you fall in love. It always ends in pain."

Alexander's pleading eyes met Magnus', conveying an unsaid sentence. This one won't.

Magnus looked at his father once more. "Just take me to Edom. I don't want to be here anymore."

Asmodeus shrugged. "Fine. Come stand beside me."

Magnus did as so, watching as Alexander came and stood so he was in Magnus' sight-line, giving Magnus so much comfort, Alexander probably wasn't aware.

Alexander nodded at Magnus, his eyes warm, face soft. Magnus was so gone for him, it was almost laughable. After all these years, Magnus was still so naive.

Magnus wasn't told to close his eyes. They slipped shut on their own, just Magnus' body's reaction to being sent home.

There was the decided feeling of being portaled; the destruction and re-construction of every cell in your body, reforming your body to a new place. After being alive for so long, portaling himself to exotic places and then back home to New York, Magnus had gotten used to the feeling. But as he came into himself, there was a slithering sickness deep in his stomach.

Edom was nothing like Magnus had imagined. He'd thought up a place with flames and a sun in the sky, the color of the flames surrounding him. Although the one about how the sun would look was correct, there wasn't just one sun. There were about three, all of them like liquid lava. Magnus had been right about one thing. Edom was hot.

They landed on a grassy hill, the grass almost all of the way up to Magnus' knees. The ground was soft under Magnus' feet.

Magnus turned around in a full circle, but his father was nowhere to be found. Neither was Alexander.

Magnus saw a large building, almost reaching the sky, far off in the distance. Magnus set off to the building, his hands ready for combat. There was no way he could do his magic down here, and Magnus was glad that Raphael had taught Magnus how to protect himself all those years ago.

Magnus' eyes were searching the setting around him, looking for any sort of danger or maybe where Alexander could be. Magnus saw nothing. The only thing around him was grassy terrain and a flowery sky, clear of clouds. Magnus was already sweating- whether it was from nerves or the heat, Magnus didn't know.

Most of the hills that Magnus trekked up were small enough that the pain in his calves was only noticeable when he began to walk on the flat plane, up to the steps of the large building settled in front of him. The doors to the building were closed tight, and they looked to be a heavy oak. Magnus' eyes traveled up the height of the building, looking at the dark stones cemented together. The building almost reminded Magnus of the New York Institute, but without all of the vines wrapped around it. Magnus felt trepidation curl around his stomach with a viselike grip, making him want to heave out the contents sloshing around inside of him. Magnus didn't do that; instead, he pushed his fist hard into the door, knocking heavily. The door didn't budge. Magnus knocked harder this time- he even considered yelling out a "hello" like they always did in the movies. He didn't. Instead Magnus pushed out a sigh, wiping the sweat from his forehead. His hand came back shiny.

Magnus wasn't too proud to admit that when the door of the building pushed open with a loud click, he leaped back with a yell. Magnus pulled himself back together quickly, pushing into the building. The hall was quiet; no one was there. Every sound Magnus made echoed through the halls, bouncing off of the empty, marble walls. The floors were marble as well. Magnus felt out of place with his dirty shoes and sweaty hair. He was probably tracking up the floor, but Magnus couldn't find it in himself to care. He needed to find Alexander.

Magnus quietly walked through the building, his eyes traveling the clean floors and walls. His ears were listening so hard he was hearing a small ringing noise. The noise made Magnus' mind whirl, and his stomach swirl like a tornado. There was so much going on within Magnus' body and nothing going on in the place around him, that Magnus' world was spinning in the opposite direction on its axis, making Magnus feel dizzy. 

Magnus leaned against the wall, pushing his head back against it. Magnus then realized that it wasn't a wall at all. Magnus turned to face the door, his sweaty hands fumbling with the golden knob. Magnus twisted the knob, pushing the door in as quietly as he could. There was no noise coming from the room as Magnus pushed in. 

Magnus was ready to push out a sigh of relief at the quiet room, but when he opened the door all of the way, a yell fell from his lips.

Alexander was kneeling on the hard marble floor at the front of the room, his head hanging low, black hair making his face impossible to see. There were chairs settled in rows in front of him, people- no, at closer inspection Magnus could see that they were all Shadowhunters- sitting in the chairs, their heads turned to Magnus. 

Beside Alexander was Clary, a seraph blade lit up in her hand. Jace was beside her, his face flaming from anger, almost as bright as Clary's hair. Isabelle was on the opposite side of Alexander. She was looking down at Alexander with nothing but hatred in her face. 

Magnus didn't waste any time. He ran up to the front of the room, tripping over his feet multiple times in the hurry to get to Alexander. 

Magnus knelt in front of Alexander, cupping Alexander's face in his hand. Magnus tilted Alexander's face up, his eyes searching Alexander's face. Alexander had blood trailing down his lip, and his left eye was starting to swell up purple. 

"Baby, I'm here. It's okay-" Magnus' voice cracked when he saw Alexander's good eye fill with tears and love- "I'm here. Baby, I'm here."

Alexander nodded into Magnus' hands. "You're here," he said softly, his voice the only push Magnus needed to have a sob fall hysterically from his lips. 

Magnus looked up at Clary. "What are you doing to him? Why are you here?"

Clary grinned, her entire face changing. This wasn't the Clary Fray Magnus had known. She was mad. With grief, or anger, Magnus didn't know. "We're here to kill Alexander, obviously. When I asked the Seelie Queen where he was located and she said Edom, well, I was surprised! I found a way here, obviously, and all of these kind Shadowhunters-" Clary gestured to the crowd with her seraph blade- "joined us here. A live execution."

Magnus pulled Alexander protectively to his chest, noting the zip ties wrapped around Alexander's wrist, that were chafing at his skin, leaving red rings around the sensitive skin there. "You won't kill him. I won't let you."

Jace grinned. "Oh, but we will. Honestly, I was hoping that you'd show up. Anyways, we'd predicted that if you  _did_ show up, you'd be doing the whole  _"Take me instead!"_ , thing, so that's why we brought him."

Magnus refused to turn around, but when he heard the familiar voice call out his name, he pulled Alexander closer to his chest as he turned to look at Raphael. 

Raphael looked a little bit uncomfortable, and he wouldn't make eye contact with Magnus, but he was walking up to Magnus and Alexander with no sort of trepidation on his face. He  _would_ hold Magnus back. There was no question about that. 

Magnus sobbed into Alexander's hair. "Please, Raph. Don't. I saved you- you're alive because of me. Don't take away my life. Don't do it."

Raphael had never been the type of guy to show his emotions. Magnus had just gotten really good at reading them.

So, seeing the red tear fall down Raphael's cheek made Magnus quiet in surprise. "Magnus, I have to. Alexander is evil. He's killed. You may love him, but he does not love you. I am doing this  _for_ you. I love you, Magnus. You're my best friend. I refuse to let this- this  _demon_ kill you."

Magnus tried to fight. He did. Magnus kicked, and he screamed. But Raphael was a vampire and he had the strength that only a vampire could posses. Magnus wasn't going to give up. He wouldn't. 

Clary grinned at Jace, balancing the seraph blade in her hands. 

Magnus tried to rip himself free from Raphael, but Raphael only tightened his arms around Magnus' body, holding Magnus to his chest. Magnus felt his heartbeat throughout his entire body. 

Alexander looked up at Magnus. "I love you."

Magnus shook his head, a sob slipped mercilessly from his lips; one after the other, sobs fell from Magnus, tears fell from his eyes. Magnus' whole body- no, his whole  _world_ was falling apart. There was nothing- nothing, anymore. Once that seraph blade was to fall on Alexander, there would be nothing left for Magnus.

Clary raised the seraph blade high.

"I love you, Magnus. I love you, I love you."

Magnus was shaking his head. Magnus fell on his knees, and pulled Raphael down with him. "I love you-"

 

Magnus woke with a start, a hand gripped hard on his shoulder. 

"Magnus? Magnus- Magnus, you're okay. It was just a fear demon. You're okay. It's dead now."

Magnus opened his eyes slowly. He must be dreaming. Alexander was there, sunlight gripping at the edge of his dark hair and turning it gold. Alexander's hazel eyes were filled with concern and anger. Was he mad at Magnus for not saving him? 

And then Alexander's words registered into Magnus' brain.  _It was just a fear demon._

"Alexander?"

Magnus' voice was hoarse, as if he'd beed screaming. Magnus was sure that he had been. 

Alexander gasped, before cupping Magnus' face in his hands, tears filling those beautiful hazel eyes. "I thought you were going to die. Not many people can survive a fear demon. But you did. You did."

Magnus didn't want to cry. He wasn't sure that he could cry. But when Magnus touched a hand to his face, he felt tears soaking his cheeks. Had he already been crying? 

Alexander nodded. "You were crying and screaming."

Magnus didn't know he'd asked the question out loud, but he just nodded. Alexander was here. That was all that mattered to Magnus. 

Alexander, as if reading Magnus' mind- or maybe Magnus had said that out loud too- Alexander settled his head on Magnus' chest. Magnus felt like he was finally home. 

"I love you," Magnus said. Magnus sniffled. "I love you. I love you, I love you."

Alexander looked up at Magnus. "I love you too." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> fuCKING FINALLY!!!!! i know the i love you was a wee bit rushed, but, i mean, magnus thought his bby died. i would be saying i love you too. also, asmodeus is gETTING HIS next chapter :))))  
> (hAHA "you unlocked something in me" IS A MAGNUS QUOTE I USED FOR ALEXANDER PLS GET MAD)
> 
> if any of y'all are in florida or anywhere close to it that could be affected by the hurricanes, stay safe!  
> sending love to everyone ❤
> 
> question of the day (or night):  
> favorite feature of yourself? (looks, traits, characteristics, anything.)  
> because of all the hate going around the world, let's give our selfs some love :)  
> i really love my eyes!!!  
> eyes are the window to the soul & all that so i'm good with mine.  
> on good days i'm told they're gray & sometimes i'm told they're blue & a few days ago my best friend said they looked green.  
> the windows to my soul are colorful as fuck :')))) 
> 
> i watched this movie today, and it was fucking amazing. one of the characters was bi & another one was gay, and no one made a big deal over it, and i loved it.  
> the movie was called "rough night" and was probably the funniest fucking thing i've ever seen (seconded to deadpool, of course)  
> watch it if you want to laugh & also if you want to see dick glasses, dick straws, dick hats, and, dick pasta. there's just a lot-  
> also hot girls and guys, sooo 
> 
> as always, kudos & comments are welcome <3
> 
> all the love,
> 
> tori. <3


	7. Sloth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello, angels!
> 
> here's the final chapter!  
> i'm so glad i started this story & i'm so glad everyone loved it.  
> y'all are fucking amazing <3
> 
> listen,,,,  
> i have a really bad headache (and this is kind irrelevant) and my throat is sore as hell, but i'm writing for you darlings because i have nothing better to do. i have honey tea, though, so let's hope it helps a bit.  
> and also because i love y'all. 
> 
> also, at school i was going outside for one of my classes, and there was glitter on the door handle (it's game day, and our school is proud as fuck) & it's still all over my hands and i'm a purple and silver mess. (which means my computer is going to be one too)
> 
> anyways, enjoy, angels<3
> 
> -also, asmodeus is about to get his wig SNATCHED.  
> (i talk to tayvian too much, i need help)

Magnus could practically see the steam coming from Alexander's ears. It was quite obvious that Alexander was pissed. Magnus was having trouble walking, his body heavy with still-lingering fear, and Alexander was pretty much carrying Magnus to a huge building- the same building from Magnus' dream-thingy. 

Magnus' body was heavy, but Magnus had never felt so light. Alexander loved him too. Magnus had found someone who loved him, and someone who Magnus could be with forever. 

That wasn't an easy feat. Most warlocks were assholes, and most mortals were afraid of commitment. But Alexander- although very obviously pissed- was also very obviously smug. Magnus could read that from Alexander's eyes. 

What a lot of mortals didn't understand was that love never died. Love was immortal. 

Magnus still had scars on his heart from his lost loves. That would never go away; the scars would only fade. Alexander helped shoulder Magnus' pain, and to Magnus, that's what love was about. Finding someone who helped you carry your pain. Because pain didn't just disappear. Not if it was pain, that hurt, and  _burned_. Magnus wasn't in love with Imasu, or Etta, or Camille, anymore. But he  _loved_ them. He'd carry that love with him forever. 

(Maybe not so much on the Camille part. She was  _kinda_ a bitch.) 

"You know what?" Alexander said randomly, startling Magnus. 

Magnus stopped walking when Alexander did. "I do not know what, but I am sure you will tell me what."

"Just get on my back. It'll make this much easier. Help you rejuvenate faster. Hop on, and I'll carry you. I need to catch your father before he leaves, anyways. We need to have a civil chat."

Magnus scoffed, hobbling over to Alexander's back. "We're in Hell, the chats here are probably nothing close to civil. I mean, I just had a dream where Clary sliced your head off. No civility in that, no way."

Alexander was silent. "That's what your biggest fear is? Me dying."

Magnus felt a bit uncomfortable, his hands held tight on Alexander's shoulders. "Yes. That's my biggest fear. I'm there, and I can't do anything to help you, and you just die, right in front of my eyes."

Alexander turned around, forcing Magnus' hands off of his shoulders. Alexander's eyes were full of what Magnus could only describe as pain. "I don't ever want you to feel like that. I'm going to be with you for as long as you'll have me. No silly Shadowhunters will get me. I promise."

Magnus looked down at his feet, shame building inside of him. "I know that it's unrealistic, but I can't help it. I'm afraid for the man that I love to die. I never want you in pain." 

Alexander cupped Magnus' cheek. Normally at this part in the movies, the character that Alexander would be playing, would have a heartfelt line, something along the lines of "pain doesn't affect me when you're here". But this was not a movie, and they were not characters. There wasn't any games in life, but there were wins and losses. 

"Being in pain is how I've been my whole life, Magnus. You're right to be afraid of pain. But be afraid for yourself, never for me. I want you to be as safe as possible, and that means you need to be aware of yourself. Forget about me. Think about you."

Magnus kissed Alexander's palm. "You're literally going to be with me forever, forgetting about you is going to be a  _bit_ challenging."

Alexander rolled his eyes- but Magnus could see the blush that was tinting the top of his cheeks- and turned around again. "Carry on with your mooching."

Magnus settled his hand on Alexander's shoulders. "What do you mean by mooching?"

Alexander caught Magnus on his back as Magnus jumped up and wrapped his legs around Alexander's waist and let his arms hang loosely around Alexander's throat. "Nothing. Just that you're mooching off of me, right now, at this very moment."

Magnus scoffed. "Would you rather me mooch or make us walk .2 miles per hour? Because it's one or the other, Alexander. No in between."

"So I can't choose or?"

Magnus shook his head even though Alexander couldn't really see him. "No choosing or. Speaking of, have you ever played would you rather?"

 

The trek to the building Magnus saw in his dream was so much less tiring. The ground wasn't as elevated in places, and when there was hills, they weren't overly large. Magnus also figured it was easier because he wasn't the one walking. 

Alexander didn't even seem to be out of breath from carrying Magnus, talking to Magnus and replying to Magnus' comments with his own, not at all short of breath. Magnus could also tell that Alexander was still fuming.

The way Alexander carried Magnus- with a tight grip around his legs- showed that if anything were to happen, Alexander would be there to protect Magnus in any sort of way. Alexander was  _also_ cursing under his breath every few minutes, probably talking shit about Asmodeus, or something. Magnus didn't care to listen in and disturb Alexander.

"Would you rather be in hell with me, or on Earth with me?" Magnus asked. 

Alexander was quiet a moment, thinking. "Probably... either. As long as I'm with you."

Magnus felt his heart tumble around in his chest, tripping over all of the love radiating from his every pore. "That- that was very smooth. Very, very smooth. Like Jif peanut butter."

"I thought that it was Jiffy peanut butter. I distinctly remember my Mother making me a sandwich with that on it."

Magnus hooted with laughter. "Mandela affect. I was there when the peanut butter came out. It's Jif."

Alexander shook his head. "Pretty sure it's not. But it's okay. We'll save that argument for later." Alexander let Magnus hop off of his back, pushing through the doors of the big building. "I'm about to have a chat with your father."

Magnus sighed at Alexander's dramatics- all while knowing that he himself would be the same way- and entered the building behind Alexander. 

With a very slow pace- almost a crawl- Alexander and Magnus made it to the room.  _The_ room. 

"This is the throne room," Alexander whispered in Magnus' ear, his arm wrapped protectively around Magnus' waist.

All while being here, Magnus hadn't seen one demon frolicking the meadows. Maybe that meant something, maybe that didn't. Magnus did know, though that his leg was throbbing and he would most definitely be sore tomorrow. 

Magnus looked around the familiar room, but this time there was something decidedly different. There were no Shadowhunters sat around the front of the room, watching Clary Fray behead Alexander. There were also two thrones sat in the front of the room. 

The thrones were beautiful. One was made out of a silvery white material- kind of reminding Magnus of bone- winding around each other. At the head of the throne, the pieces of metal- Magnus assumed it was metal- met at four points. 

The second throne- which was a bit smaller than the first, settled right beside the throne of bone- was made of a shifting brownish-green metal, intertwined like vines wrapped around a tree. This throne was beautiful, but was the throne a queen would sit upon, beside her king. 

Magnus looked over at Alexander in surprise. "Whose thrones are those?"

Alexander looked at Magnus, his eyes dazed and glazed over. "Oh-  _oh_ , um, those are no ones. Just for decoration."

Magnus knew that Alexander was lying. A  _toddler_ would've been able to tell that Alexander was lying. But Magnus felt no reason to attempt pulling the answer from Alexander. There was a reason that Alexander wasn't telling him.

"Your father should be here-" 

Alexander's sentence was so rudely cut off when Asmodeus poofed into existence, causing Magnus to gasp quietly in fear, and Alexander to roll his eyes in annoyance. Alexander was quite obviously used to Asmodeus doing that, seeing as every time it was done there was no fear in Alexander. Only annoyance.

"I'm here," Asmodeus said, gesturing to himself.

Magnus rolled his eyes. "Duh."

Alexander nudged Magnus quiet with his arms, and Magnus had to hold in a proud smile when Alexander approached Asmodeus with no sort of nervousness or trepidation. "So, Magnus was just nearly killed by a fear demon."

Asmodeus frowned. "Pity. Those are my good ones."

Magnus was ready to tell Asmodeus that that was definitely  _not_ the right thing to say, but Alexander did that for him- just with harsher words than Magnus would've used. 

"So you'd rather have Magnus dead than a  _demon_? You literally have demons all over this place. Edom is crawling with the beasts. But you couldn't at least warn Magnus about it?"

Asmodeus leveled Alexander with a hard stare. "Magnus can take care of himself just fine. He is a warlock, after all."

Magnus decided it was his turn to pipe in. "Yes, hi, your son over here. Well, seeing as I am your son, I can't use my magic in my home realm. Such as Edom is. So, father, I might have demon blood, but while in Edom, I am no warlock."

"Then how did the demon die?" Asmodeus asked. 

Alexander raised his hand up sarcastically. "That was me. I still have angel blood. Quick reflexes, and all. Anyways, I feel as if it might be beneficial for everyone if you left Edom. Please."

Magnus smiled. He wouldn't much mind his father leaving, either. Although him and Alexander couldn't go for strolls with their demon pets nibbling at the dry, sun bleached grass, they could still have their peace. One way or another. 

Asmodeus shrugged. "Sure. I have things to deal with. Lilith has a new pet Shadowhunter, or something like that. He's blonde. Ever heard of him?"

"Sebastian Verlac?" Alexander offered. 

Asmodeus shook his head. "Nope. Another blonde. Starts with a 'J', I'm sure."

Alexander's face morphed into something unreadable- but Magnus could see the way Alexander's shoulders stiffened. "Jace Wayland?"

The demon nodded. "Sounds right. Bye."

Asmodeus was gone within Magnus' next blink.

 

"I'm not saying that we should have a pet snake, but I'm just saying that if we do happen to stumble upon a snake that we keep it caged up in this very room and feed it mice."

Alexander smiled at Magnus, but there was no amusement in it.

After hearing about Jace, Alexander had clammed up, his shoulders set tightly, his lips pulled into a small line. The shifting of Alexander's hazel eyes seemed to be elevated, not only shifting colors, but feelings. Magnus could easily read the pain in Alexander's eyes. And the guilt. Even though Magnus had been the one to kill Clary, Alexander still blamed himself for forcing Magnus to become that way. But Magnus hadn't been forced. He killed Clary without a second though, leaving Jace without the other half of his soul and Isabelle without the other half of her heart. It was Magnus' decision. 

"Alexander, please stop hurting over this. I'm the one who killed Clary. I'm the one who made Jace stoop to that level. I can't stand to see you hurt over something I did."

Magnus had always felt deeper and wider. He hurt for everyone when they hurt. That's why Magnus had tried putting up walls to protect his heart; to protect himself. There wasn't anything Magnus could do to make himself feel better while Alexander was hurting. Except for Alexander to feel better.

Alexander stood up from the small couch he'd been seated in- turns out Alexander's place in Edom was actually quite stylish- and grabbed both of Magnus' hands in his own. "Remember how I told you that the only person I knew that felt as much as you did was me? I'm still like that- I still hurt for everyone. For you, for Isabelle. And for Jace." Alexander was quiet a moment, and Magnus was dismayed to see tears gathering in Alexander's downcast eyes. "Sometimes I think that if I'd stayed a Shadowhunter that Jace and I would've become  _parabatai_. Or maybe I'd be  _parabatai_ with Isabelle. I don't know. But I do know that Jace will never have a big brother, and neither will Isabelle. Both of her older brothers have abandoned her. Did you know that I have a little brother? His name is Max. He was born about seven months after I was sent away. My mother hadn't been far along enough to show. Isabelle told me, though." A shimmering tear slipped from Alexander's eye, sliding down his cheek. "I never- I was never there. I couldn't be."

Magnus didn't know what to say. There was nothing he could say. So Magnus decided to speak with his actions rather than his words. 

Magnus stood on his tiptoes- although it strained his leg and made him have to hold in a gasp of pain- and wrapped his arms around Alexander's shoulders, pulling Alexander down to his chest. 

Alexander let himself be held, dissolving into the touch like sugar in water. A sob fell from Alexander, the sharp sound stifled by the fabric woven on Magnus' shirt. Magnus would hold Alexander for as long as Alexander needed him to. 

That was the thing about being in love. It was always there, thumping inside your heart, thrumming in your veins, floating in your mind. 

In Alexander's case, his love was wrapped around him in a tight embrace. 

 

**

 

Normally Magnus would've complained about the hardness beneath him. He'd always liked to be comfortable. 

But sitting in his silvery white throne made Magnus feel like he belonged here. This was his home. 

Alexander glanced over at him from his own throne. The demons all around them were causing a ruckus, instigating fights with the others, slithering around the walls like giant worms. Magnus smiled as the noises fell away and all that he heard was his own thudding heartbeat in his chest. 

Alexander reached out a hand from his slightly smaller throne, offering his hand to Magnus like a peace offering. Magnus wrapped his fingers in Alexanders, his rings colliding with warm fingers and soft skin, holding the gem carefully in his hand. 

"I love you," Alexander said quietly.

Magnus took a deep breath. There was a small fluttering in Magnus' stomach- he'd diagnosed himself with butterflies, although he'd never tell Alexander that- at the words. With a few words, Alexander could turn Magnus into a puddle of love and affection. 

"I love you too."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THE ENDDDD  
> if you didn't think that the two of them were going to have their own fucking thrones to sit on, you must've been surprised!! i would nEVER put a prince of hell & a great greater demon together in hell without a throne.  
> i am not evil.  
> (yes, i made jace a beast who converses with lilith. i hate jace (oops don't come at me) so why not??)
> 
> sooo this last chapter took so long because i'm in school and they hate me.  
> but in english i did read this short story called 'a very dangerous game', or something like that.  
> it was so good that i had to come home & download it on my phone because i hadn't finished it in class.  
> the shit was intense as hell, but it was a m a z i n g 
> 
> question of the day (or night):  
> for my final question- favorite disney movie/disney princess?  
> mulan, and mulan. i really love mulan.  
> thank y'all for being fucking amazing & dealing with this crazy ass story.  
> love y'all so much <3
> 
> as always, kudos & comments are welcome!!!!
> 
> all the love,
> 
> tori <3

**Author's Note:**

> wOw what a man.
> 
> i got this story idea off of a youtube video called madness by: Onceuponavideo  
> go watch it it's fabulous.
> 
> alright so, here's a disclaimer:  
> alexander is in no way sebastian/jonathan morgenstern. he has feelings (and not for his sister.)  
> thank you for your time.
> 
> as always, kudos & comments are welcome, and very much appreciated <3
> 
> -find me on twitter @salyersbaby so we can chat 'nd all that fun stuff :)
> 
> all the love,
> 
> tori. <3


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